Moby Ted

Great Moments In Socialism 92 Comments

Borrowing an idea spotted at The Corner – help Ted Kennedy name his memoirs,
Update: The suggestions are beginning to roll in…

“Memories of Dead Things” – My liver and my lovers
Driving Miss Kopeckne
The Bridges of Chappaquiddick County

And the early frontrunner –

TEDDY: Not even worth shooting

92 Replies to “Moby Ted”

  10. I don’t find this particularly funny. Never forget that this is a man who had both of his elder brothers shot to death publicly, the latter only one year before the Chappaquiddick incident. Small wonder he’s had a battle with alcoholism over the course of his life.

  11. I call BS on the last comment.First, he was expelled from Harvard for cheating on a Spanish exam. He was a grown man when he chose to participate in destructive behaviour. He essentially committed manslaughter when Kopeckne died. He then chickened out and used his family name to beat the rap, when all the while he was married with children.
    I have personally gone through an absolutely horrible family tragedy and never once used it as an excuse for bad behaviour.
    He is not a man, he is nothing more than a useless piece of skin.

  15. Given that according to the Boston Globe link, “Kennedy will work with a collaborator and a researcher” a good title would be “The Ghosts of Chappaquiddick County”.

  16. Never forget that this is a man who had both of his elder brothers shot to death publicly…
    …and was born into a life of wealth and privilege that most of us cannot imagine, had started cutting corners on academic and professional requirements well before either brother got involved in politics, has spent most of his life chasing women (not that there’s anything wrong with that…) even unto the death of one poor girl (and there is something wrong with that), and -with an inexplicably sure seat in the most important legislature on the planet- has accomplished essentially nothing. By the way, don’t forget Joe Jr – the first and perhaps worst of old Joe’s many disappointments.
    By staying in the political realm, Teddy has chosen to remain a target. Tirelessly invoking the images of his brothers has made him a bigger one, while being such a pompous windbag has made him irresistable.

  17. Belisarius – are you excusing his alcoholism or his behaviour when he left Mary Jo to drown? Chappaquiddick shows the true measure of this man.
    here is my helpful book title for poor Mr. Kennedy
    “Down em and Drown em”
    by Teddy “Happy to escape the Chappy” Kennedy

  18. Belisarius; There are many reasons for drinking and one just entered my head,if you cant drink when your living,how the Hell do you drink when your dead.There are many recovered alcoholics,He’s not one of them.

  19. Belisarius – you misunderstand. No one here is making fun of the Kopechne family tragedy – to the contrary. We are showing intense social disapproval of the man (sic) that caused it. Nor are we limiting our disapproval to this one instance, but to a lifetime of mendacity across the spectrum of his activities.
    Now, if you object to mocking a lush, I suggest you take the issue up with MADD, who are just a trifle more blunt on the subject.

  20. http://www.ytedk.com/index.htm
    An exhaustive look at Ted Kennedy can be found at the above link. It is well researched , factual and a real eye opener when you see all the things done by the Kennedy family. I was amazed to find out how corrupt and influential Joe Kennedy really was and how he went about acheiving his goals. Also some good information on how the media ‘could be bought’ and influenced. All the police details on the chappaquiddick incident there as well.
    Greetings to all in KateLand , Canada’s newest best province.
    Arnie

  22. OMMAG wins hands down.
    Belisarius, where’s your brain, Teddy may have battled the bottle, but, battling lechery as in being an adulterous skirt chasing pig that resulted in drowning a kid because he was too drunk to drive was pretty sleazy, dead brothers or not. He went home never reporting the incident until it grabbed him by the butt. Some pathetic Kennedy capo read his insipid mea culpa statement for him the next morning. The creep. He gets a pass for what, again?
    What keeps him alive politically is that the creep has over the decades cultivated lots of victim politic fools/paybacks/handouts on his plantation.

  24. How about Ted Kennedy: the Law years, My time at the firm of Drinkem,Dinkem and Dunkem.

  28. “Drinkem, Dinkem and Dunkem”, good one WL!
    I haven’t seen Teddy’s bloated face on the TV since they showed him bloviating in righteous (if hypocritical, indignation) at Clarence Thomas’ senate inquisition. How many years ago was that? Is he really still that bloated and alcoholic looking?
    http://www.ytedk.com/

  30. belisarius
    if the shot brothers were the problem, then 30 years later he wuz still effected, maybe he should have been put in a rubber room for life
    FYI it wuz estimated that maryjo surivived for about 2 hours after the “accident”, and it wuz estimated that it would have taken 45 minutes to get help, which was just up the road from the scene, and extract maryjo from the car. So I would call that murder, nothing less!!!!

  31. These aren’t original, but…
    It’s still safer going hunting with Dick Cheney than going on a date with Teddy Kennedy.
    My guns have killed fewer people than Teddy Kennedy’s car.
    Here’s one from PJ O’Rourke:
    “Sen. Ted Kennedy: “And when the Reagan administration was selling arms to Iran, WHERE WAS GEORGE?”
    Answer: Dry, sober, and at home with his wife.”
    Ann Coulter: “Ted, we’ll drive off the side of that bridge when we come to it.”

  32. If you loved “Sleepless in Seattle”
    then you are absolutely going to adore this cased series of titles for the Holiday giving:
    “Boozing in Boston”
    “Wasted in Washington”
    “Bombed in Bean Town”
    AND
    “High in Hyannis”
    packed with the companion How-to pamplet:
    “Pickling and Self-Embalming: an Experts Guide”

  33. Teddy Bare.
    The Kopechne family was bought off and Mary Jo’s body was never exhumed. If anyone has suffered, it isn’t Ted Kennedy. His nephew Will Kennedy
    Smith got off for date rape at the Kennedy compound in Florida…the pickled Senator is
    a bloviating gasbag and an embarrassment to the
    Democratic Party and the memory of his brothers
    who had intelligence, integrity and grace.
    Yeah, Papa Joe was a scary bootlegger who made his millions during Prohibition, but he DID want
    better for his family even though it was paid
    for through breaking the law.
    Ironic, isn’t it?
    Papa Joe was also the one who wanted to appease
    Hitler; and his OWN SON, John F. wrote a timely book on appeasement entitled ‘Why England Slept.’
    Still standard reading in US military libraries
    today.

  35. funny stuff what a great way to start my day. i don’t think it’s possible to add to the great stuff you all have contributed.

  36. Yo Cricket! Is that the same “in-tegrity” the dead brothers were pumping into Norma-Jean? Or maybe its the same integrity that ghost-wrote “Profiles in Courage”? Anyhow try this title:
    “MY LIFE – 40 YEARS AT THE PUBLIC TROUGH AND ZERO TO SHOW FOR”.

  39. Cricket, it’s generally agreed by scholars that JFK’s book “Why England Slept” was mostly ghost-written by another scholar, whose name unfortunately escapes me at the moment.

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