I, For One, Welcome Our New Self-Driving Overlords

17 Replies to “I, For One, Welcome Our New Self-Driving Overlords”

1. Someone hit the “Murderous Rampage” button. I told them not to put those on any more.

   1. He may have been triggered by my forthcoming book, “Freeway Exit Design in the 60’s and 70’s: the Murderous Ramp Age”.

2. No disassemble!

3. Nothing to worry about. A UN mandate requires all robots be programmed to follow the Three Laws of Robotics:

   1. A robot may not injure a human or, through inaction, allow a human to come to harm.
   2. A robot must obey orders given to it by humans except where such orders would conflict with Law 1.
   3. A robot must protect its own existence as long as such protection does not conflict with Laws 1 or 2.

   HA! JUST KIDDING!!

4. The ditzy broad scares me way more than the robot.

5. “What the F**k did you guys run???!!!???

   “Ummm”.

   1. Heh, That was “Riverdance”. I’m sure of it.

      1. Have you noticed it’s called “Riverdance” but they never get their feet wet?

6. The semi well coordinated robots who’ve been programmed to play soccer in China recently, well it’s soccer and there isn’t a LOT to worry about if they get angry, but someday, someday someone is going to program them to skate and it’s going to be all over for Canada.

   1. But Canada will respond with state-of-the-art elbow programming.

7. Y’know, everybody gets bent out of shape about the robot sentry guns. “Ohr nores, it’ll be SKYNET!!!”

   Nobody considers that while the robot was programmed by highly trained engineers who can be sued if they get it wrong, the guy who’s going to push the button to make it go will be some dumb kid who may or may not have finished high school, and may or may not be able to count up to ten on his fingers and toes.

   Officer on the radio: “Private! Is that sentry gun facing toward the enemy?!”
   Private, not looking up from Candy Crush on his phone, can’t even see the gun anyway: “Yes sir, sure is. Uh huh.”
   [Gun is in fact pointing right at the HQ tent and is set for “fire on movement,” firing angle is 360 degrees, a full circle, because it’s easier that way.]

   This is more the kind of thing I think about.

   1. ”We are electrical engineers, and we decided that in order to solve this problem of hitting a fast drone that’s accelerating at five Gs at a couple hundred yards, you would need an incredibly high-end current that goes through a motor and encoders that know the position of your gun at all times,” he told Wired

      Great … I will be accidentally murdered by some geeky EE who hit the wrong command on his Tesla dashboard BIG SCREEN while in “self-killing” mode. Nope. Wasn’t on my bingo card for Death Day

8. Shortly before the video started, one robot said to the other “hold my beer”.

9. Isn’t that exactly what happened in China some months ago…a robot hanging on a gantry going spastic?

10. Don’t worry obviously the Tech Bro’s know what’s best for everyone.

11. So glad it was on a tether.

12. Imagine a table full of them gathered for Thanksgiving dinner.