22 Replies to “No Viking Funeral For You”

  1. “The waste heat generated from each cremation is used to heat the leisure facilities. It feeds the leisure centre with all the heat it needs to operate the swimming pool.”
    The British Labour Party continuing the fine traditions of the German National Socialist Party!

  6. But, then, for contrast, historically, here is Dickens describing 19th century gravesites in London, per his description in Bleak House. Back to bleak redux, eh, poor Jo?
    To Quote…
    “Then the active and intelligent, who has got into the morning papers as such, comes with his pauper company to Mr. Krook’s and bears off the body of our dear brother here departed to a hemmed-in churchyard, pestiferous and obscene, whence malignant diseases are communicated to the bodies of our dear brothers and sisters who have not departed, while our dear brothers and sisters who hang about official back-stairs — would to heaven they HAD departed! — are very complacent and agreeable. Into a beastly scrap of ground which a Turk would reject as a savage abomination and a Caffre would shudder at, they bring our dear brother here departed to receive Christian burial.

    With houses looking on, on every side, save where a reeking little tunnel of a court gives access to the iron gate — with every villainy of life in action close on death, and every poisonous element of death in action close on life — here they lower our dear brother down a foot or two, here sow him in corruption, to be raised in corruption: an avenging ghost at many a sick-bedside, a shameful testimony to future ages how civilization and barbarism walked this boastful island together.

    Come night, come darkness, for you cannot come too soon or stay too long by such a place as this! Come, straggling lights into the windows of the ugly houses; and you who do iniquity therein, do it at least with this dread scene shut out! Come, flame of gas, burning so sullenly above the iron gate, on which the poisoned air deposits its witch-ointment slimy to the touch! It is well that you should call to every passerby, “Look here!”

  8. This will be entertaining. Hindus require cremation for the soul to leave the body. Which do you think falls more into their religious doctrine? 50 minutes to 2 hours tops. Or using an electric oven process that could take as long as 6 to 8 hours?

    And the UK has A LOT of Hindus. Their colonialism sealed that deal decades ago.

    (On a side note, someone really needs to sit these one-trick pony zealots down and walk them through the process of creating electricity)

  10. soooooooooooooooooooooooooo yet another cultural tradition tossed by THE LABOUR MPS THAT THESE STILL CROAKING DUMASS KCUF WAD BRITS PUT IN POWER.
    everyone hear this. shut up the whinging until after the nxt election. whatever riding, prty, nation ITS ALL YTHE SAME BYATCH BYATCH BYATCH ABOUT STARMER NEWSOME FORD CARNEY
    EVERY
    ONE
    OF
    THEM
    ELECTED

  11. Regarding the coffins … I will choose either Teak or Walnut.
    We don’t have much wicker or bamboo here in the Great White North, but we have a shit-load of Pine and Fir which would be good for the serfs ….

    T’would be a shame to waste good hardwood on plebs eh wot.

    If I am in a coffin I am not likely to give a shit about the mythical Climate Change … which I already don’t give a shit about. Neither does just about everyone I know.

  12. P.S. l looked into the regulations etc for building my own pine box for cremation.
    but naturally comes the time to hand it over to the funeral home its ‘oh the rules changed’
    do that to me in my time of great grief and l’ll put you in one of your own and NOTHING TO LOSE. m’kay ripoff funeral monopoly?? dipwads exploiting people’s grief AND the fact pretty much every one of us gone thru dat only did it once ergo no experience to back up our demands??

  14. With mohammedans taking over their country it’s good that Starmer & Co are focused on the important issues.

    mhb23re

    1. Psst … King Charles is a Muslim. Or at least Muslim-adjacent.

      I cannot tell you how pleased I was to hear that during Trump’s upcoming State visit to England … the Royal Family has decided to push Princess Kate forward as the “face of the Monarchy”. Thank God. Not Allah.

  15. Maybe they can make the new ovens work on solar power, just like Trudeau wants Canadian Steel mills to operate.

  18. Climate Change is a religion being practised by its adherents with increasingly maniacal fervour and we are now well into “How many angels can dance on the head of a pin?” territory which is well beyond “burn the blasphemers”.

  19. It’s as if Labour has a brain trust with the mission of finding new ways for the Labour Party to be hated.

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