Accidentally setting herself on fire

A muffled cry for help delivered from the fold-and-smooch position.
h/t exetaz

28 Replies to “Accidentally setting herself on fire”

WebMD; Vomit – expel the contents of the stomach

Nobody at home eh?..wonder why..?..

Aw, c’mon. It’s kind of sad and pathetic. :o)

I guess it’s true that if you do live alone and you set yourself on fire you’ll probably have to put it out yourself.
Is that the moral? I’m confused.

I never thought I’d say this about WaPo, but some of the comments are pretty damn funny.
“Come on, if you can print this crap, you can run my story on how I got over the fear of toilet cleaning by applying hemorrhoid creme in the dark.”

Maybe this is an object lesson (an obama teaching moment) as to why the human race tends to not live alone. This could also have been evolution in action.

After reading that screed,it is no surprise she is alone.Not even a metro-boy would be attracted to that.
Black Mamba…LOL…thanks for the Sunday morning laugh.

How’s that Adele mega hit go?
I set fire to the mane…

Her assertion that it was an accident doesn’t prove it was an accident.

Tooner, stupid and accident are close cousins

I’m just saying, there are probably some people who would want to set someone like her on fire. And even she might be one of them.

I’ve known people who woke up from an accident as quadriplegic who whined less than that.

Now that she is a “hot chick” maybe, just maybe……………

All I have to say is what a hysterical ditz, I burned myself herp-derp I’m going to google that!

It is, but what I find remarkable is that both the woman herself and the editor(s) who decided to publish the piece as just another one of those hip, semi-humorous urban modern-woman lifestyle confessionals/anecdotes were clearly unaware that it reads instead like a case study from a diagnostic manual about OCPD…or one of the “D’s”.

“After I dropped the charred fragments of my beloved shirt into the trash, I realized I still needed coffee. So I returned to the stove. With my arm ramrod straight, and my body crouched several feet away, I ignited the flame. It was 9 a.m. It had taken only one hour to disfigure myself.

“But it was done now, and I turned to the knitting. I focused on the goal, to make every woman at the party swell with ooohs and aaahs…”

The woman needs private treatment – which would probably entail a two-hour long palaver while her shrink sits enduringly with his face in his palms – not publication in a newspaper.

Honestly this is the kinda hysterical stupidity that men of my grandfathers generation and previous used to knock their wives around a little for. Ricky Ricardo woulda said You have lots of splainin to do and Jackie Gleason would have gone pow right in the kisser.
I’m starting to think they might have had things figured out.

She does seem a tad high maintenance. Also, I don’t think “tea sandwiches” exist. I can sort of get my head around the concept but it seems very impractical.

And using no brains,she would vote for a third term for the Zero.

Then she proved the theory of relativity by stabbing herself in the eye with a knitting needle.
She sounds dumb enough to prove anything to herself by hurting herself anyway she can daily.

That sort of sharing every minute detail of their empty lives is common with the people addicted to social media. They require constant validation, and always have their cell phone within reach or pasted to their ear.

She does seem a tad high maintenance.
Every social media addict I’ve met is a high maintenance person. It’s a good tell, and makes them easy to avoid.

BINGO…same as selfies.

A living burning proof against both theories of evolution and of intelligent design.

Stop drop and blog
I’m surprised there isn’t a selfie of the selfie

While not endorsing the article in general, every person that I know who lives alone, particularly as he or she gets older, harbours a fear of being unable to get help in a time of difficulty or having one’s remains found days (or weeks or months) later.

This is yet another example of the destruction caused by the temporal perversion known as “daylight savings time”. I refuse to engage in this perversion and stay on PST year round. Any hospital notes I make have PST on them as do death certificates I fill out. I’ve refused to change the date/time of death for individuals who die between 23:00 and 23:59 PST and my rant about the evils of temporal perverions to the unlucky individual from medical records who tried to get me to conform to DST will hopefully have dissauded them from trying to convince me to go along with this evil in the future. Anyone who asks me the time gets it in PST. People seem to get confused by my responses to their texts coming before the one they sent me which I view as an opportunity to open the discussion on mindless conformity to idiotic policies.
This woman was lucky in that she survived unlike the scores of people who die yearly in MVA’s when the national temporal perversion occurs. Individuals who are chronically sleep deprived are far more likely to die from falling asleep at the wheel when they are forced to get up an hour earlier. I’ll add this posts example of the dangers of DST to my growing list of reasons why this idiotic statist policy should be abolished. SK has been spared the carnage caused by DST and it’s up to those of us in locations with imbecilic politicians to simply say no to DST.

Black Mamba: “high maintenance” is an understatement. Although, being in San Fran, she just might find a roommate that is also socially and logically dysfunctional.

28 Replies to “Accidentally setting herself on fire”

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