Oh noes!
Trees are feasting on decades of carbon dioxide emissions and growing bigger as a result, according to a new study of U.S. forests.
Scientists tracked wood volume in 10 different tree groups from 1997 to 2017, finding that all except aspen-birch grew larger. Over that same period, carbon dioxide levels went from 363 parts per million to 405 parts per million, owing largely to the burning of fossil fuels. More abundant CO2 accelerates photosynthesis, causing plants to grow faster, a phenomenon known as “carbon fertilization.” The findings were published in the journal Nature Communications.
I mean, everything about this has to be bad.
Obviously a threat to air travel
^+++
>>>!!!!>>>> Bang the F on..LOL..!!
Plant obesity is going to become a serious issue now!!! Stop Breathing On Your Plants, you herbicidal maniacs!!!
‘
I’m sure Big Ag can come up with a drug for that.
“, a phenomenon known as “carbon fertilization.”
When did the definition of phenomenon become “obvious thing everyone knows about”?
+++GA
Immediately after urban ignorance went viral.
You can bet that it’s another bullshit study.
Real studies need subsidies till infinity
How do you say (Dis-information) (-:
Love it
To quote Ronald Reagan’s former press secretary James Brady: “Killer trees”
The rise of the Ents.
Seriously though, if it is not portrayed as a crisis or supporting a crisis theory in the paper, it gets no funding.
Politicians are not interested in truth or facts, only opportunities to support their own agenda of more power.
Well as long as they don’t pull up their roots and start walking…”Oh look, a meteor shower…”
As the cockney said to the tree spirits, “Get thee ents!”
Somewhere in the Liberal War Room:
Stephen: “Justin, it’s not working. The trees are growing bigger, and there is more green in the land that we have seen in decades!”
Trudeau: “Don’t worry Stephen, I have a plan”
Stephen: “What is it?”
Trudeau: “I was talking to Gerry….he said we should SEND OUT the young Liberals to camp across Canada’s woodlands…..and they are going to be taking a lot of matches…hehehe….camp fires”
Stephen: “But we tried that last year…….and people still don’t want to pay the carbon tax”
Trudeau: “It’s a “tax on pollution, Stephen….get it right”
Stephen: “Sorry…of course you are right. How many Young Liberals are you sending out”
Trudeau: “How many forests are close enough for the CBC to get to quickly”
Stephen: “oh…ok, I get it”
Trudeau: “And if that doesn’t work….we will remind voters that Poilevre has two children. And both are alive because they were born. That mean’s he’s going to take away the right to choose”
Stephen: “Brilliant!”
Trudeau: “I was born for this job”
When plants grow faster, they become less nutritious! All the gypsy moths are going to get skinnier!
Wait…I said “gypsy”. I’m so sorry for my bigotry.
I think they’ve been “travelers” for about twenty minutes.
Because they roam the plains, they are called “Romany”, as in, “Romany interesting plains lately?”
Sometimes I just start up my lawn mower and let it sit and run in the driveway until it runs out of gas. I’m greening up the neighborhood.
We could start a cult.
Don’t you DARE try that in CA … or you’ll get a visit from the air quality police !!
https://www.latimes.com/california/story/2021-12-09/california-regulators-phaseout-new-gas-powered-lawnmowers-and-leaf-blowers
Yes. small gasoline engines are BANNED in CA. Not to worry though, because water has become so expensive … rock gardens are replacing all those lawns. See what happens when some idiot writes a book called “Cadillac Desert”. Guess the author HATED dams, reservoirs, and water management … and HATED people
The solution to this travesty is to rip out those evil trees and replace them with bird grinders. Oh, and giant Chinese mirrors.
Somewhere vegetarian bird grinders are under development.
MSM running with the headline “CO2 threatening Aspen-birch trees with extinction” in 3…2…
Very good but not alarming enough.
“Climate change to cause man-eating jungle plants to sweep through the arctic like wildfire, study says”.
So, more CO2 means more vegetation, which means more food, which means more life.
Got it. Maybe Earth needs more CO2. Maybe too much carbon is bound up in coal and oil deposits that have been trapped under the surface by millions of years of sediment.
.
There is no money in letting nature solve the fake climate crisis.
.
Oh noes, fat trees! Fresh lumber growing faster!
How awful.
The wheels are falling off the climate change CO2 is bad narrative.
Can’t come soon enough.
Literally trillions stolen from the public.
Other death cults will quickly replace Climate Cupcakism.
Speaking of Fauci…
Golly, it’s just like Miss Valentine said back in 1950’s elementary school when she taught us the plant cycle and photo synthesis. If only I listened more I would have known then what scientists are just discovering now. It makes one weep. We did it to ourselves. Please, Miss Valentine, return and teach the children.
Masters of the Obvious, The Lizzo Trees Episode.
It is almost as if they gave degrees in this in college.
When is hug-a-tree day going to happen?
Oh great! More leaves, more pollen, more sticks, more needles, more cones, more tree debris!
More CO2 means more vegetables.
I think we already have enough of those in parliament.
I think most people don’t like big trees. They block the sun and have big roots that ruin the lawn. All those leaves making a mess in the fall. They can fall on your house! That pollin sucks too! Clogging the air and all messy on the car. The bugs and birds piss people off too.
Talking of not liking trees, there’s this little gem from England:
https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-13427041/Retired-teacher-police-warning-fallen-leaves-neighbours.html
Glad I don’t live there now.
Those trees need to shape up, and change their behavior.
Climate realists have been saying this for years (decades?). There’s a symbiotic relationship between CO2 and plants. 400ppm is not excessive or dangerous to the Earth’s flora and fauna, plants do best at around 1000-1100ppm. The Earth is billions of years old and has seen every climate condition under the Sun many times over. It is not a fragile system, Earth and the current species have evolved to adapt to changing climate conditions for eons.
I have said for years that in the future the theory of human caused CO2 climate catastrophe will be remembered to be as ridiculous as the religious wars against a Sun centered solar system. Just a new cabal of pseudo-religious control freaks in charge who persecute any scientist who challenges the orthodoxy.
An interesting article on coastlines, and sea level changes since the ice age.
https://worldoceanreview.com/en/wor-5/coastal-dynamics/on-the-origin-and-demise-of-coasts/#:
Scroll through to see some maps showing the size of land masses during the ice age.
Greta the Grouch will no doubt start a “No Fat Trees” movement.
So … does this mean Gibson Guitar will be getting their shipment of Ebony and Rosewood back from the Federal agents who seized them?
https://www.nbcnews.com/business/markets/gibson-guitar-hit-penalty-importing-rare-woods-flna927206
That was Obama exacting a penance.
We had Regulationfare before we had Lawfare. Right?
Fifty-two years ago I worked a summer at a forest experimental station (Kananaskis) where we grew Douglas Fir seedlings in Styrofoam containers at 5000 ft in elevation in a greenhouse where the intake vent included a Bunsen burner running continuously to double the CO2 concentration. We planted the seedlings at 16 weeks after germination and they were double the size of control seedlings. Since then the greenhouse effect went from being a well known positive to politically inspired and financed hysteria.
What they seem to have “discovered” is that trees grow .. who knew? The rate of deforestation for a variety of reasons has fallen, forest industry plantations are managed for improved growing conditions, and, of course, there is the increased CO₂ fertilizing.
The only beef I have with the article is, “…owing largely to the burning of fossil fuels.” That is pure conjecture. How would they know this?
Oh no, Crop yields are becoming record breaking and people are easily growing food in their back yards. Quick let’s add another tax.
Tree- Do these extra leaves make me look fat?
Me: No but those are some Fat Looking Leaves.