Honey, I Finished The Internet – small dead animals

15 Replies to “Honey, I Finished The Internet”

Alas, they don’t make them like that anymore. Probably wouldn’t be allowed!

“Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit sniffing glue…”

the flic was unintentionally quite realistic at one point.
when the blow up doll pilot achieves release from, you know,
and is so out of breath from the rush he/it deflates.
just saying.
release this in 2023 and theaters will burn.

Was working that summer at a Drive-In theater.
Lotsa fun.

Interesting that the writer of this article wouldn’t touch the pedophilia joke with his own 4 inch stiffy of a pole. “Joey, have you ever seen a grown man naked?”

https://youtu.be/u7OJXBBOF3M?si=rtFB1NiboWSSRte9

Can you even IMAGINE that passing for a joke today? No. It would be impossible … because that’s what our elementary school teachers are doing to our kids each day! Showing them grown men and women naked. To groom them as unwitting sex toys. ”Joey, have you ever wanted to be a girl?”

“S’cuse me while I whip this out.”

Ah, Back In The Day™. Brings a tear to my eye.

Kenji says:

January 10, 2024 at 1:37 am

What!? Blazing Saddles was about “racist” humor? Ohhhhhh nowwwww I see … white folk eating beans farting up a storm … does portray dumb white racists as stinky dumb white racists

We call it FLYING HIGH here, and I always liked the surgeon saying on the phone, “Give me Hamm, hold the Mayo”! while the transplantable heart eagerly jumped around on his desk!!!

Airplane II was pretty good, too. …and Cannonball Run.

That movie along with countless others could never be made today.
Progressives are such buzzkills.
“I want you to be as miserable as me”.

In 1965, there was a one season Western named The Loner. Written by Rod Serling, it has a kind of ironic neo-noir vibe to it. A pity it only got one season, because the writing is excellent. It stars Lloyd Bridges as a Civil War veteran dillusioned by his experiences, wandering the West and getting into all kinds of dark situations.

In one episode, a group of desperate Quakers try to hire him to assassinate a local cattle baron whose thugs are driving the Quakers off their land. The baron is played by…Leslie Nielson. The climax of the episode is a tense standoof between Nielson and Bridges, both being deadly serious and a hair’s breadth from drawing on each other. I kept waiting for the punchline.

Actually Airplane revitalized Leslie Neilson’s career. Up until then he was basically a dramatic actor. I think his last starring role was the captain on the Poseidon Adventure. You could find him on guest star roles on various tv shows, but movies were few and far between. I met him when I was on the Canadian game show Definition. He was a very nice down to earth person.

ebt says:

January 10, 2024 at 2:56 pm

All sources agree that Leslie Neilson was a very good person and a lot of fun. I always treasured an ad he did for the lottery. He played a fellow who had been hired to promote a chip shop by walking around dressed as an enormous potato, who comes in asking for “the winning ticket, please” as he needs to get out of his job. Pleasant enough commercial, but it ended with what looked to me like an ad lib that Nielson had come up with and the delighted producers used it. Dressed in his potato costume he addressed the camera solemnly: “There are no small roles. (Dramatic pause). Only small potatoes!” The way he delivered it, it was fall-over-laughing funny.

A very funny movie that could never be made now in America. Even if it was made elsewhere it would likely be banned or movie theatres would be burned to the ground during ‘mostly peaceful protests’.