I, For One, Welcome Our New Self-Driving Overlords

Put your trust in technology: Équité Association has issued this year’s list of top stolen vehicles

In fact, a vehicle without a theft-deterrent system didn’t hit the list until number 24: a 2006 Ford F350 SD 4WD, 90 of which were taken this year. They also break down the lists by region. More pickups are stolen in Alberta because more pickups live in Alberta. You get all the way to the 33rd spot in that province to find 18 missing 2014 Ford Escapes — before the pickupfest continues. These lists used to be a podge of easily-taken vehicles that lacked modern theft deterrents, or expensive SUVs that were being stolen to order, often by crime syndicates. That has rapidly evolved into lists dominated by newer vehicles, as sophisticated thieves outsmart the most advanced systems. […]

We’ve been telling you for years now that it’s easy to intercept the signal from your fob (that is safely inside your home) with a hacking device, open and start the car and drive away. Gast suggests keeping fobs in a Faraday-type pouch or box — or even a metal box. You can source them at many places, but he emphasizes that the market is flooded with fake merchandise. Amazon is a terrible gatekeeper, so (wait for it), do your research.

Signal jamming is so 2019, however. Now, they’re simply cracking into the onboard diagnostics port (ODP) attached to your wiring harness and coding a new fob, and taking off. You are left standing there clutching a useless fob that no longer is associated with your car. This solved their problem of having a car they couldn’t turn off or that was driven out of range of the original fob.

Gast says he’s back to recommending the Club steering wheel lock devices that my Dad was so enamoured with to protect his Mercury Topaz in 1985.

20 Replies to “I, For One, Welcome Our New Self-Driving Overlords”

  1. Three pedals and a column-mounted gearshift are pretty good theft deterrents. And, on newer vehicles, it is pretty easy to mount a hidden switch wired to interrupt current to the starter or fuel pump. Of course, if the really, really want your car, they will just winch it onto the deck of a rollback.

    1. Not for the pro. They simply drive up with a small flatbead, hoist the car onto it. If spotted, it is just assumed your vehicle is being towed away for some valid reason.

  2. Yes. Drive standard. Had two vehicles with failed ignition switches. Wired up a toggle & push button to start. Added a hood hasp and padlock to deter battery theft. Used steering wheel club for awhile. Motos have brake disc /cable locks.
    Ease of use=ease of theft.
    Lock it or lose it.

    1. Manual hasn’t been standard in North America in more than half a century. An automatic transmission is now standard, while there are a few models that offer manual as an option.

      1. Calgary. ‘70 C10. Manual everything. Battery stolen while vehicle parked in back yard. About a year later whole vehicle stolen, hot wired off street. When it was “found” by the parking authority they tagged it as illegally parked, after being called in as abandoned, towed to impound. It sat there for a week or two before someone called me to come get it. Had to pay towing charge in-out and storage. WTF? Anyway i traded that cursed GM product for a moto…good times.
        Wrote letters to Mayor and Police Chief. Both pointed finger elsewhere. The Man serving the public.

  3. This is just begging for an owner DNA/fingerprint only ignition or some such, perhaps an outside agency not unlike let’s say “Lifeline” or a Home security system who for a minimal monthly fee will allow you to drive away provided the right password is given and a vehicle disable feature if it isn’t correct or plugged in in a timely manner.
    Of course the software will be provided by our benevolent Chinese overlords.
    It’s possible I’ve given this way too much thought.

  4. Your refridgerator is a good Faraday cage. Some years ago, I lef tmy cell phone in there and couldn’t find it for a long time.

  5. What moron thought getting rid of mechanical locks and ignition switch was a good idea? Multiple levels of security is such a good idea the retards dropped it. When I go on long vacations I use my club. I don’t want to walk back to Alberta from California.

  6. Take a sledge hammer to a few strategic points on the vehicle to make it less “desirable”. Or buy one of the many victims of a heavy hailstorm, cheap like borscht. I’m not so vain that I need a “pretty” car.

  7. I lived in sw Saskatchewan
    I was 40 years old before I learned that the key comes out of the ignition

  8. Heaven forbid our elected politicians enact legislation requiring courts to dispense appropriate sentencing for offenders. I know, I know, courts will render such legislation useless, but whos running this country anyway, you and I citizen or the legal industry?

  9. Th problem with AI is that it was conceived and developed by a very specific “strain” of humans.

    Arthur Clark recognized the problem with his HAL computer in “2001; a Space Odyssey”.

    “I can’t open the pod bay door, Dave”.

    And all that.

    Followed soon after by; “Dave….Dave….What are you doing, Dave?………….Daisy, Daisy…….

    “Metacognition” is NOT a desirable feature in a car. Ditto; “self-learning”.

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