The force of 450 Minuteman 3 missiles is primed to unleash nuclear devastation on a moment’s notice, capable of obliterating people and places halfway around the globe.
And the guys running the joint have been cheating on exams.
The cheating involved unauthorized passing of answers to exams designed to test missile launch officers’ proficiency in handling “emergency war orders,” which are messages involving the targeting and launching of missiles. […]
A total of 100 missile launch crew members at Malmstrom were identified as potentially involved in the cheating, but nine were cleared by investigators. Another nine of the 100 are being handled separately by the Air Force Office of Special Investigation; eight of those nine involve possible criminal charges stemming from the alleged mishandling of classified information.
Of the remaining 82 officers, an estimated 30 to 40 are eligible to be retrained and returned to duty on the missile force; the rest face unspecified disciplinary action that could include dismissal from the Air Force, officials said. Of the 82 facing disciplinary action, 79 are still at Malmstrom; the three others had moved to other bases or left active duty.
Oh, did I say “joint”?
The cheating at Malmstrom was discovered in early January during the course of an unrelated drug investigation that included two launch officers …
From the comments – “Is this what Obama was referring to the other day when he said that his biggest fear was someone nuking New York City?”
Kate, ‘revisited’ has a typo…
Thanks!
… Air Force … what else can one say?
Cheers
Is this what Obama was referring to the other day when he said that his biggest fear was someone nuking New York City?
“The Air Force has just released its official report on its investigation into Maj. Gen. Michael Carey’s July trip to Moscow, which got him fired in October. Carey oversaw three wings of nuclear-armed intercontinental ballistic missiles, with 450 ICBMs in all. At the time, the dismissal was reportedly over personal misconduct during the official trip. But “misconduct,” it turns out, does not even come close.
“The 42-page report is a doozy. It describes Carey as drinking heavily, spending an awful lot of time with two foreign women (a possible security risk), skipping meetings, complaining, offending the Russian hosts, at one point trying to perform with a band at a Moscow bar called La Cantina and generally acting a bit like a college kid on a semester abroad. The drinking got so bad that, according to the report, “one witness was concerned that Maj Gen Carey needed assistance standing.””
http://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/worldviews/wp/2013/12/19/amazing-details-from-the-drunken-moscow-bender-that-got-an-air-force-general-fired/
“O believers, wine and arrow-shuffling, idols and divining-arrows are an abomination, some of Satan’s work; so avoid it; haply So you will prosper. Satan only desires to precipitate enmity and hatred between you in regard to wine and arrow-shuffling, and to bar you from the remembrance of God, and from prayer. Will you then desist?”
Al-Quran Verses (5:90-91)
I always thought the missileman job – despite all the sexy Cold War brinkmanship and hype surrounding it – was fundamentally the most unimaginably boring sort of military career you could have. Sort of like being a high-order commissionaire at a security desk.
No wonder there are problems. You try doing shifts at the bottom of a silo, day in, day out, with a key round your neck and a partner you might have to shoot.
The test: Question 1:
When the computer beeps you should ?
A) Open the door
B) Turn the key
C) Drink heavily like a Secret Service agent
End of test
Not a hard test is it ? I think this is just a backdoor method of reducing our nuclear deterrence. FYI “B” is the correct answer but you may engage in “C” after “B” is complete.
Yeah, but, wouldn’t there be a possibility of incoming after you turned the key? Maybe D should be added – get down on your knees and pray.
Understand one thing about this, many of these officers are women.
Dan Kurt
Mike Rogers will retire to join Mark Levin as national radio host.
“Rep. Mike Rogers (R-Mich.), the chairman of the House Intelligence Committee, plans to retire from Congress after his current term to host a national radio show syndicated by Cumulus Media, he announced Friday.”
http://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/post-politics/wp/2014/03/28/rep-mike-rogers-to-retire-launch-national-radio-show/?tid=ts_carousel
Yeah well, I recall a conversation with one of these rocketeers.
He said it wuz like years of boredom, punctuated by periods of absolute terror.
Remember the command facilities are heavily guarded subterranean bunkers, whose precise location is the prospective enemy’s PRIMARY target…..GROUND ZERO. In a nuclear exchange, the missile controllers are probably the first casualties.
Remember the USSR, unable to make a reliable toaster, made the most precise ICBM’s.
I’ve been down these holes and it is not a very inspiring job. Most of these subterranian officers were studying for master’s degrees to get the edge on promotion. I later got to work for one who had made it to full colonel; he was incapable of making any decisions since he had spent his whole career to that point simply awaiting orders.
There’s going to be a large increase in the penguin counting staff at King Salmon, Alaska, I’d say…
Reminds me of helping a buddy with a part time job at a postal centre.
More drugs than the police have in a lock up. No body even tried to hide it.
The job was so boring most of the staff was ripped all day.
E) Run like hell towards Canada.
F) Start digging.
G) Ride your rocket to within a meter of the space station and . . . Jump.
H) Evolve into a cockroach.
Sorry, I just couldn’t help myself. I know, I need therapy.
A test, to press the GO button, how silly are these turds? My dog can do that and then some!!!!
So the koran is a war manual…
You have no idea how pissed command types get if they have to redo an exercise for failing.
A Private told some how he was going to do it as enemy force (26+ years ago).
They laughed.
He did it.
Oops.
Check off the boxes and carry on…