Election 2011: Suspected John

2011 Federal Election 361 Comments


Updated with video. 787 Dundas St. W, today (red sign). Sun News: Suspected bawdy house raided in Project Cobra
“Jack” is short for “john”, isn’t it?
’96 police report, breaking now on SunTV. Short form: Jack Layton was found naked in the company of a woman, getting a “shiatsu massage” during a police raid. No charges laid. Getting further analysis now from Sun’s expert adulterer.
Update – print story up now.
Apparently, the campaign decided the first response was best delivered by Olivia Chow. Now, that’s Prime Ministerial.
Uh oh. Urban Dictionary Update.

361 Replies to “Election 2011: Suspected John”

  3. People are asking how come this hasn’t come “up” before.
    Because there was no Sun News Network.
    I’ll bet Lloyd and Peter have known about this for a long, long time, and just kept it under wraps.
    As I said in an earlier post, there’s something off, weird, not quite right, about Jack. I’ve never been able to put my finger on it (good thing, too) but I’m thinking we’re about to find out about what makes Jack … tick.

  4. “If the story is verified it will be on CBC/CTV/Global etc.”
    Perhaps but until then the Big Media will report on the much bigger more important stories that Canadians feel affect their lives. Like the Longest Wedding Ever.

  5. I suppose this was the “April surprise” then?
    It’ll be like Iggy getting booed at the hockey game. They will HAVE to pay attention as it’s going viral.

  8. So in the early 2000’s Clinton and Bush 41 wound up in the same barber shop getting shaves at the same time. The barbers were speechless, not wanting to say anything at all because they didn’t want the two to start arguing. After Clinton was done, his barber asked him “Would you like some aftershave on that Mr. President?” and Clinton asked to smell it. One sniff later, Clinton burst out “Oh Gawd no, that smells like a whorehouse. Hillary would kill me!”. At just that moment Bush’s shave finished. His barber asked him “Would you like some aftershave on that Mr. President?”. Without missing a beat, Bush responded “sure, neither Barbara nor I know what a whorehouse smells like.”

  11. “No, officer, I said I was into a Shih Tzu.”
    “If the Kleenex was wet, you must forget!”

  12. The Sun reporter is cracking me up: “smear job” . . . “campaign starting to grow” . . . “lots of balls in the air.”

  13. Loosely related: Media, Shaw off air.
    This is will sound parnoid but my pre-set recording of the Beck series of shows, keeps getting wiped (for those not familiar with PVR, you can set the digital recorder to record all of a series — say all the Beck shows). Was talking with a good friend, a fellow Beck fan, and he’s had the same problem. And he confirms that this pre-set series deletion happens on no other show, only Beck. I strongly suspect people at Shaw, who can look into the digital cable box, are fooking with my scheduled series recordings.

  14. from the sun:
    “When the policeman and his partner walked into a second-floor room at the Toronto massage parlour, they saw an attractive 5-foot-10 Asian woman who was in her mid-20s and the married, then-Metro councillor, lying on his back in bed.”
    bed? not a table?

  15. Little Jack Dipper
    Went to a stripper
    Sampling some Asian Pie
    Along came the Vice Squad
    And said: ‘Gotcha‘ You big Fraud!
    And Jack went ‘Wee, wee, wee, all the way home!
    [So what if it’s two different nursery rhymes?]

  16. Was she qualified to give a massage? Did he check her credentials or did she have a certificate on the wall? Was this a certified clinic? come one MSM get some questions happening and clarify. Never mind his statements.

  18. I know that plenty of Dipper supporters will be crying foul over this, but fair’s fair. Max Bernier got booted out of caucus for dating some woman with vague biker gang connections. The MSM was all over that non-story for weeks and weeks. The Dippers like to dish it out, but they sure can’t take it.

  21. “What wet Kleenex, officer? I was field testing the new NDP/Coalition immigration certificate?”

  25. So Jack’s defense is that he is too f%*king stupid to spot the difference between a massage therapist and a rub n tug?
    Brilliant!

  26. It was so well known that Tommy Douglas was an adulterer that his Minister use to call him “Tommy Tow Wives”.
    Seems like Jack-Off Layton is more like Tommy Douglas that any of us realized.

  27. Perhaps he was just helping the girl with her family reunification plans. Apparently she had a younger sister Jack wanted to meet.

  28. I wonder if Jack told Olivia about being naked and the cum soaked kleenex when he supposedly told her the story many years ago. No wrath like a Chinese wife….

  29. By not issuing his own statement on the matter – by relying on his wife’s and his lawyer’s and Kathleen Monk’s statements instead – Layton is acting more like a suspect than a leader.
    He’s going to have to address the issue sooner rather than later, but his choice of language in doing so is going to be problematic. It’s a given that he’ll say it’s all a dirty-tactic smear, and he’ll bring up the timing of it, but at some point he will have to address the specifics of the allegation by either denying that he knew it was a suspected bawdy house connected to organized Asian crime (which would be tantamount to admitting that it was) or he’ll have to say that it wasn’t that kind establishment.” The first statement sounds implausible, while the latter would invite constantly-updated “fact-checking” about the establishment – including photos, background stories on organized Asian crime, and forced prostitution, and immigration abuse, etc., etc., — in the news cycle.
    On the most important issue – the election – it will be interesting to see whether this is the sort of thing that will greatly offend left-leaning voters, including left-leaning Quebecers. I suspect not.
    Here are my predictions: the usual suspects in the left/prog MSM will redirect this story into an attack on Sun TV News; we will hear and read accusations of American-style “dirty politics” and suggestions that this is all about the Harper “regime.”

  30. Come listen to a story ‘bout Taliban Jack
    A poor little socialist looking for some crack
    But things got kinda desparate with nothing round to screw
    So he fired off his gun with the help of Madame Wu.
    Well the next thing you know, Old Jack’s so debonair
    Kin folks say “Jack move away from here”
    “Ottawa with Iggy is the place you ought to be”
    So he packed up the prius… but he died on SUN TV

  31. Just saw the latest report from the campaign trail (I think in Courtnay) and he is talking about a “smear campaign”. and though the colour on today’s T.V. is very true to life, there appears to be no blush on his face. The least they could have done is put some rouge on his cheeks.

  34. Jack WOULD say that, wouldn’t he?
    From the Grope and Flail:
    Search
    Home
    » bawdyhouse Search
    Query
    19 results
    Did you mean: powerhouse

  36. come on Sun News TV:
    get cameras down to that neighborhood.
    show us the building.
    get inside and show the rooms if possible.
    does it look like it is or could have been a legit massage therapy clinic?

  39. I guess the NDP have locked up the prostitute vote. Iggy stole the junky vote away so Jack made up for that.

  40. Why don’t Jack take on a real beauty right there in his own party! I’m speaking of the ravishing Libby Davis of course! More his type.

  41. Mississauga Matt: Sun reporter was breaking me up too!
    “We all know politics is a body contact sport”
    “has this affected Jack’s performance tonight”
    and, “for Jack Layton, I’m sure it will come up again tomorrow”

  42. Okaaay…..
    I’m reputed to be politically slightly to the right of Attila the Hun……I am sooo not a Layton/NDP supporter….
    GET A GRIP!
    Oh yeah I’m bald and have a mustache…but this is soooo petty.
    I suspect the perverts are the ones titulated by this revelation…IMHO…
    Whiskey Tango Foxtrot……

  43. As his Shiatsu princess should have told him, “erections have consequences Missa Jack”

  44. Come listen to a story ‘bout Taliban Jack
    A poor little socialist looking for some crack
    But things got kinda desparate with nothing round to screw
    So he fired off his gun with the help of Madame Wu.
    Well the next thing you know, Old Jack’s so debonair
    Kin folks say “Jack move away from here”
    “Ottawa with Iggy is the place you ought to be”
    So he packed up the prius… but he died on SUN TV
    ——————————
    @ Jamie MacMaster.
    Well done sir.

  47. Probably some bald mustched 15 year old runnin around TO Chitown about now just wishin mom had aborted him. Suck it up Jack, you live by the sword, Maxime Bernier is sending you a card no doubt. For to long bad people have been given a pass by our MSM, well the good people are now watching, your fun is over perverts.

  49. Rosemary Barton from CBC said they will do their own investigation on this story. The National didn’t have it on…no room…it was all taken up with Harper bashing and showing NFLD…ABC and Mildewski smearing the PM.
    Guess this is why Jack-off voted against pedefiles(SP) sexually involved with minors, sentencing. Could be why he didn’t like the budget…the crime bills??
    This story could of been handed to the Sun by Liberals too…they are experts at digging…

  50. Mississauga Matt, you’re the greatest! That being said, if you get your hands on the triad extortion video, please don’t post it!

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