39 Replies to “Y2Kyoto: What Would We Do Without Experts?”

  2. Methane is lighter than air – I hope Bessie has a parachute strapped-on that we can’t see in the photo.

  4. Seriously, the absolute hysteria over so-called anthropogenic global warming by this generation will be the laughing stock of generations to come.

  5. Did the billions and gazillions of buffalo we evil whitemen killed ever do anything so nasty as fart or burp?
    Maybe we were doing Gaia a big favour by whacking all those fartin’ and burpin’ buffalo?
    Who’s next? The wildebeests?

  6. Well now I’m pissed right off. When I first looked at the pic I thought some clever Canadian had solved the age old problem of tiring portages around wild rapids.
    I clicked the link only to discover that isn’t a canoe but an Argentinian fart catcher.
    The worst part of this is I still have to carry the flicking canoe!
    Syncro

  8. I suppose the Liberal Party of Canada will soon propose a cow-fart-tax (CFT) to save the planet.
    (Brain-farts, such as all comments from Garth Turner will be initially exempted.)

  10. our “farm” dog saw that contraption and is now hiding, she has talent that could win FARTING a contest !!!!

  11. The great 17th-18th century Anglo-Irish satirist, Jonathan Swift, would probably be suing these guys for plagiarism:
    “I was complaining of a small fit of the Cholick; upon which my Conductor led me into a Room, where a great Physician resided, who was famous for curing that Disease by contrary Operations from the same Instrument. He had a large Pair of Bellows with a long slender Muzzle of Ivory. This he conveyed eight Inches up the Anus, and drawing in the Wind, he affirmed he could make the Guts as lank as a dried Bladder. But when the Disease was more stubborn and violent, he let in the Muzzle while the Bellows were full of Wind, which he discharged into the Body of the Patient, then withdrew the Instrument to replenish it, clapping his Thumb strongly against the Orifice of the Fundament; and this being repeated three or four Times, the adventitious Wind would rush out, bringing the noxious along with it (like Water put into a Pump), and the Patient recover. I saw him try both Experiments upon a Dog, but could not discern any Effect from the former. After the latter, the Animal was ready to burst, and made so violent a Discharge, as was very offensive to me and my Companions. The Dog died on the Spot, and we left the Doctor endeavouring to recover him by the same Operation.”
    http://www.jaffebros.com/lee/gulliver/bk3/chap3-5.html

  12. If you’re the guy (or perhaps the gal) who has the responsibility for attaching the tank to the cow, what do you say when somebody asks you what you do for a living?
    “I’m part of a team studying greenhouse gases and their effects on the earth’s temperature.”
    “Yeah. So do you collect the data, or analyze it?”
    “Well, sort of.”
    “Which one? Collect or analyze?”
    “I assist in the collection.”
    “So you assist in the collection of data.”
    “Well, not data, exactly.”

  13. Damn, 1000 to 8000 Litres/day of CH4 per Cow? And Argentina has 55 mil cows?
    Natural gas prices hover around $7 bux an mcf ( thousand cubic ft ) as I understand it. 1000mcf = 28316.8 Litres.
    So if each cow produces, say, 1000 L/day x 55 million, we get 55 Trillion Litres/day.
    55 Trillion Litres converts to aproximately 2 Trillion mcf. 2 Trillion mcf times $7.xx
    $140 million dollars a day. Do I have that right? ….or is it $14 trillion.
    Smelly indeed, renewable energy though. 😮

  14. China and India refuse to cap their CO2 emissions, but since methane is a much more “destructive” greenhouse gas than C02, shouldn’t their ~ 2.4 billion citizens, comprising about 40% of the world population be paying for their collective methane emissions?
    Shouldn’t Stéphane Dion be clamoring for a world-wide “green-house-gas” tax on rice and beans?

  15. What is interesting is that they are now experimenting with feeding cattle with their traditional foods – instead of this grain quick fattening crap.
    I’ve yet to see a cow jump a fence to get into a corn field.

  16. lilli
    My numbers:
    1000 l per cow per day (I assume a typo, where they meant 800 to 1000 l per day) yields 12.9 mcf per cow per year, for a value of $155 (Nat gas price is closer to $12 per mcf).
    The national yield is $155 times 55 million, or $8.5 billion per year.
    Watch for pink bags on cows everywhere.

  18. “As one of the world’s biggest beef producers, Argentina has more than 55 million cows grazing in its famed Pampas grasslands.”
    How does that compare to about 7.5 billion humans farting too?
    I think we should just tech cows and people alike to light their farts with a Bic lighter. Problem solved and the laughs would never stop.

  19. With this kind of crazy story you’d think people would start to get slightly skeptical about AGW.
    A lot of people will have a lot of egg on thier faces in a couple of years.

  21. Were any cows harmed in the making of this photo? Where is PETA when you need them to ensure we are not eating meat, drinking milk and staying warm through cow fart technology?

  22. Woodporter,
    “The national yield is $155 times 55 million, or $8.5 billion per year –
    watch for pink bags on cows everywhere.”
    check. I apprecitate the elucidation.
    empty pink bags into newly constructed pipeline, which then runs from Buenos Aires to Crawford Texas. Naturally, Bushchimphitler would need to “illegally” invade first.

  24. This bull/cow shit is now beyond bizarre. Taxpayers should be witholding taxes for the simple reason that money is being wasted for this lunacy is criminal. People are starving and to please the stinking lying theiveing money sucking environmentalists we resort to THIS. I raise cows, they don’t fart unless they strain to get up, they probably fart less than a stinking enviromentalis does after he eats his fruits and nuts and combs the lice and crabs out of his scraggly beard and ponytail!

  26. “Seriously, the absolute hysteria over so-called anthropogenic global warming by this generation will be the laughing stock of generations to come.”
    Fact.

  27. So, let me get this straight: You have here a cow with a plastic ballon on it’s back that is filled with explosive methane gas, right? Does Al Qaeda know about this eco-friendly explosive backpack?
    The oilpatch already has a solution to the gas build up. It’s called flaring.

  28. So, here we have a cow, from which lovely steaks come.
    Here we have methane, from which a nice enviro- friendly fire can be generated.
    This seems like a match made in Heaven (the pun works too). The cow eats her whole life producing the very methane over which she will be BBQ’d (minus some mesquite of course!).
    Sometimes, out of pure chance, the lefties will have a good idea*, kinda like a 1000 monkeys on 1000 typewriters. On 2nd thought, exactly like 1000 monkeys…
    *(No, I don’t really think this is a good idea)
    Now, if only we could attach these gas-bags to the lefties themselves. But instead of collecting what comes from their a&&, we put another bag around their head and pump it into that. Thus, we couldn’t hear or smell them.
    That would really be a match made in heaven.
    Oh to dream of what could be!!

  29. “Did the billions and gazillions of buffalo we evil whitemen killed ever do anything so nasty as fart or burp?
    Maybe we were doing Gaia a big favour by whacking all those fartin’ and burpin’ buffalo?
    Who’s next?”
    Suzuki should volunteer to save the planet.

  30. That cow is eating grass. Grass that only very recently captured some CO2 or methane from the air or soil. It is now returning that back to the air.
    The is *NO* new greenhouse or any other kind of gas being produced by that animal.

  31. So this is what a fart catcher looks like. I always thought they were the flunkies who served government ministers.

  33. What have they done to that cow! I’m with synchro — looks like a canoe strapped to her back – eh.

  34. I can already see those evil corporations feeding those poor cows baked beans and cabage to increase there methane volume per unit.
    And for the car and vehicle industry using methane:
    – Cowazaki
    – Chevrolet’s Methane Carlo
    – Pontiac’s Gran Tootismo
    – Ford Fartlane
    (feel free to add to list…)
    Options includes new ‘sfart’ seats where passengers can ‘contribute’ to the gas tank while motoring

  35. Forgot to mention that Esso will change it slogan to:
    “Put some bovine in your tank”

  36. Yep, a whole new fleet of fart cars.Seriously tho,these bags would need to be alarmed so they don’t burst. Imagine if thousands of these burst at relatively the same time the result would be an instant rise in temperature of 2 or 3 degrees.

  37. Now I finally understand what the F in my F-Series pickup stands for. I can only assume the 150, 250, 350 etc. designation must speak to the relative potency of emissions.
    This would explain why my one ton goes like stink.
    Syncro

  38. Grind a Grit: “Fahrtfergnugen” would be Volkswagen’s new marketing phrase.
    Possibly many here don’t remember that marketing campaign.

  39. Seen at Slashdot: “Fuels from bodily waste. Will you choose peesel or shitroleum?”
    A reply to this says, “Actually, it’s assholine”.
    I almost sprayed beer on my screen but I’m careful with my emissions.

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