25 Replies to “The Return on Investment of a Vasectomy”

  1. Right on Captain. Not only are you saving money,but you are not raising CO2 spewing prodigy who are killing Gaia. Al Gore should give you his Nobel Prize! See?? We are all catching on to this AGW fear mongering! :):):).
    On the other hand, I am one of the lucky(?) ones who do not require a snip-snip.But by my reckoning,all the food and booze I spent on getting lucky with no worries of off-spring, my ROI would be about -1000%. 🙁

  3. dunno about the captain,since all that return belongs to us(those who procreated)

  6. I’m pretty sure that the return belongs to the captain. He didn’t pay for the vasectomy and he saves money because of it. I’m surprised though that he didn’t link to the Voluntary Human Extinction Movement.
    Good article though and if you liked that one you’ll probably appreciate his article on imperfect substitutes and parasitic relationship of a female human getting a cat rather than a boyfriend.

  7. Piss off the eco-fundamentalists, have 10 kids! As for contraception, it dehumanizes people and often doesn’t work. Then people decided to kill their children. Nice society liberalism creates … a culture of death.
    Go ahead, children are lots of work, but they are great fun. Hey, and when all the liberal boomers have sucks the old age system dry, we under 40 types will at least have our kids to take care of us. And if we love them, they will.
    Peace.

  9. Amazing how STUPID we are to actually spend our money, time, and emotions on raising children when we could be having a LIFE-style.
    Good thing we stopped giving Survivor Benefits only to the breeders – gota keep those school costs in check.

  11. Its more than likely that one of my eight prodigy will be subsidizing him in his imminent old age, than the other way around. Homeschooled, wary of doctors, trying to avoid secular gov’t funded universities, entrepreneurial minded. Luckily for the Captain, they’re CHristian, so even if the gov’t doesn’t care about him, they will!
    (If people are still ALLOWED to care for the elderly…things aren’t looking good in that regard!)

  12. Well, captain, I’m not sure I agree completely, but I think your views deserve respect. If not, indeed, vast deference!

  13. What, summer reruns already?
    If The Captain really wants a great return on his investment, he could do The Job himself: razor blades are cheap. Of course, he would risk suffering a drastic demotion — to Corporal Corpse, but on the positive side, nobody would have to subsidize him.

  14. To each their own. I remember my “I’ll never have kids phase”. I babysat a lot as a teenager so I had a fair idea of the amount of work involved. Why have kids when you can have a great lifestyle of travel, conversation and freedom?
    After awhile though, I found that travel was interesting but I was always looked forward to returning home. Intelligent conversation, sure, but I always ended up talking to the same people about the same things. Little kids, on the other hand, ask totally unpredictable questions and make you work hard to explain yourself. They are also entertaining in weird and wacky ways. Lack of freedom, yeah, but once you have a job and financial responsibilities your freedom becomes limited too.
    As for financial security, in my experience very few people actually save their money, it just gets spent on disposable items and impulsive buys. I doubt that we will be poorer than the average child free family in retirement.
    The really interesting part is to watch them grow and develop distinct personalities and wonder what kind of adults they will become.
    Expensive, messy and often annoying – absolutely. Yet most of the empty-nesters (male, blue collar) I worked with still seemed to prefer talking about their kids/grandkids. The surprising part to me was the number that remarked that they wished that they had had more kids.

  17. Little kids, on the other hand, ask totally unpredictable questions and make you work hard to explain yourself.
    One time my young son (he was 5 or 6 at the time, now 17) said something incredibly insightful but I can’t remember the details.
    I asked him, “How did you know that?”.
    He said. “My brain told me.”
    I was dumbfounded and amazed.

  18. HOLD THE SNIPPERS THERE CAPTAIN! Your running downstream in a upstream philosophy. Have a couple of beers and reconsider.

  20. I feel very sorry for those that never married, or if they did, never had kids. We have friends in longterm care, and when their kids, grandkids and g/grandkids come, it is amazing how all the seniors perk up. But, it is sad to see those that never had kids, by choice, who have no one to visit, celebrate holidays, birthdays etc.
    Did you read about that family that have 19 kids and one on the way.
    Kids do say the weirdest things out of nowhere. My 5yr old grand nephew, said a bad word in kindergarten and was sent to the office, and the principal asked why he said it and he replied, mom, I told you my niceness was on holidays.
    Right his mom was the head honcho.

  21. Can’t say I’ve contributed in ‘numbers’ but I’m overwhelmingly proud of my two ‘step-daughters’ who I helped raise from a young age. Wished we could have had more.
    I’ve mentioned to many people that our generation of self-interested baby-boomers are about to enter a very lonely and isolated era of old age. Most of us had one or two kids, who in turn have had very few. With the lack of essential connection and the mobility of families, there’s going to be a lot of us having strangers wiping the drool away as we waste away in loneliness.
    Sad, but we reap what we haven’t sown.

  22. My life was a vacuum until my 3 daughters were born.
    There is no way to quantify in dollars the joy that they have brought to my life.
    And, at the end of the line, money will not be there to hold your hand when you pass on.
    Being an atheist, I believe that they are the only thing that will allow me to live on once my natural body dies.

  24. Today’s Darwin award goes to…
    Captain Capitalism for self inflicted failure to reproduce.

  25. Some people like kids, and some don’t. The notion that having kids means you will have people to visit you in a nursing home or whatnot is baloney. It depends on the kid, how they’re raised, and so forth.
    Kids can be things that make some people very miserable and take all the joy out of their life, for others, they can bring a great deal of joy to their life. My cousins both had kids and HATE it, the one swears she will never have another kid in her life, so it depends on the person.
    It’s like marriage or stay single and sleep around, some people never would want to stay with one person permanently, other people prefer a long-term relationship andor marriage.
    Also remember, vasectomies can be reversed, and if not, you can always adopt should you change your mind.

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