Customer: (pause) Greek Feta?*
Owner: Uh, not as such.
Customer: Uuh, Gorgonzola?
Owner: No.
Customer: Parmesan,
Owner: No.
Customer: Mozarella,
Owner: No.
Customer: Paper Cramer,
Owner: No.
Customer: Danish Bimbo,
Owner: No.
Customer: Czech sheep’s milk,
Owner: No.
Customer: Venezuelan Beaver Cheese?
Owner: Not *today*, sir, no.
Customer: (pause) Aah, how about Cheddar?
But … I like cheese.
How very prophetic. Smoking is now out in the bars. I predict the nachos will soon be very dry.
Heavy on the vermouth…so to speak.
Thank non-specific diety they are looking out for us.
Syncro
Banning handmade cheddar!?!
Heavens, next they will ban Wensleydale!!
God help us should the French not have their Camembert. Who would do the cheese eating?
And of course there will be hell to pay should the Prussians not have their Tilsit!
Of course the dolts who made this decision haven’t watched Monty too closely, as we have learned from the Life of Brian:
BLESSED ARE THE CHEESEMAKERS!!
“The National Farmers’ Union described the decision as ‘ nannying gone mad’.
‘To suggest there is anything inherently harmful about cheese is absurd,’ spokesman Anthony Gibson said.
‘There is no such thing as a bad food. It is just how much of it you eat, in what balance and how much exercise you take.’
He said the new rules were ‘of no use to consumers’, adding: ‘It may very well put them off eating healthy things.’
Mary Quicke, who runs Quickes Cheese in Devon, producing handmade cheddar, said the rules had left her ‘speechless’. ‘ Frankly, i t’s bonkers,’ she told BBC Radio 4’s Today programme.”
Considering Monty Python’s dictum
BLESSED ARE THE CHEESEMAKERS
we should consult Pope Benedict XVI as this must surely violate some cardinal sin.
Hey, does anyone know what kind of cheese Pope Benny prefers?
Is there a Holy Cheese other than the Swiss kind?
And if so can it be imported from Germany?
Eternal imponderables rendered from heavenly cheeses.
I betcha Pope Benny is work on some encyclical condemning the banning of cheese. That ought to get the old London/Rome polemic back on track.
Venezuelan Beaver Cheese?
I’m not going to touch that one… I think even hinting at what it sounds like would be in extremely poor taste…
Though I think it’d require a prescription…
I know it sounds funny, but there are lots of products that are targeted towards children which are made from cheese/yogurt that are not particularly healthy because of high sugar/salt/fat content and because they’re highly processed.
Personally, after watching childrens TV with my niece 5 years ago I decided that it was the way in which food was advertized to children that was dangerous. Most foods are advertized as “[foodname] is fun to eat” which means that young children will fight you over eating a lower sugar yougurt because they want tubes, or will not want to eat an apple because they want fruit roll-ups.
I can see it now. Soon it will be contraban cheese that will surpass pot as the number one illegal substance that makes its ways across the country. Ummm…. maybe that could be my retirement “career”. Yes, that it! I will become Canada’s number one dealer in illicit cheese. Get ready to see this face in post offices across the country.
I know, my imagination has gone whey too wild and my comments are quite cheesy but, its early in the day and it gets my brain going.
Please remember, food is not being banned, merely the advertising of it to children.
That being said, serving size was not taken into account so foods that are healthy and show up in healthy eating guides (like olive oil and cheese) are in the ‘can’t advertise’list because when you have 100g or 100ml of them, they are unhealthy.
The government has fallen into the trap of not paying attention to serving sizes. Only a few foods are truly dangerous when consumed in the recommended serving size (foods with trans fat come to mind) but all foods can be dangerous when consumed in large quantities, even healthy ones like fish and eggs. And it is inappropriate serving sizes that has made western societies obese, not just inappropriate foods.
It’s the single most popular cheese in the WORLD!
Nice catch Kate 🙂
The above is close to being an entire balanced, healthy diet, and is a marked improvement over what many kids eat now.
First off seems daft to me….that being said the only cheese advertising aimed at children is cheese strings.
All other cheese advertising is aimed at adults or parents, at least here in Canada.
Are they saying no advertising of Kraft Dinner….???
Other foods banned from advertising during children’s TV include: Marmite [does Tim Blair know? – Matt], Flora Lite, half-fat cheddar, Dairylea triangles, bran flakes, camembert, sugar-coated puffed wheat, instant hot oat cereal, Jaffa cakes, reduced calorie mayonnaise, multi-grain hoop cereal, half-fat creme fraiche, takeaway chicken nuggets, potato waffles, Greek yoghurt (from sheep’s milk), ham, sausages, bacon rashers, low-fat spreads, peanuts, cashew nuts, pistachio-nuts, peanut butter, raisins, sultanas, currants, low-fat potato crisps, olive oil, butter, pizza, hamburgers, tomato ketchup, chocolate, brown sauce, cola and lemonade.
Foods which escape the ban include: Plain fromage frais, fish fingers, lasagne ready meals, currant buns, malt loaf, frozen roast potatoes, chicken curry with rice ready meal, frozen oven chips, sliced white bread, cottage cheese, supermarket frozen chicken nuggets, milk, brazil nuts, canned strawberries in syrup, diet cola and chocolate-flavoured milk.
Aside from the wonders of the British diet, what we have here is another example of the nanny state and the leeches that control it. Imagine a group of flacks being appointed to this un-august body, being paid princely sums to debate whether lemonade (!) can be advertised, and then deciding “no, it cannot!” The mind boggles.
I wonder how long it will take England to legislate to Perfection, and if they’ll change the name of the country once they achieve that state.
“Nirvana” and “Shangri-La” are both copyrighted, “utopia” sounds too much like the popular confection, so maybe……”France”!
Other foods banned from advertising during children’s TV include: Marmite…
Marmite! I grwe up on that stuf. It mad me the nam I am tadoy.
Ah you got me Kate, I thought for sure Colby Cosh took a swipe at France’s war record, and current dimhi status.
Boy was I wrong.
Well Fwance can go ahead and ban all the cheese advertising they want to their petite formage eaters, just don’t mess with those surrender commercials.
I suspect the McCains have taken over there, too.
Stop advertising with Cheese!
“You DO have some actual cheese here, one presumes?”
“Oh, yes sir! It’s a cheese SHOP, sir!”
“I see. Just checking…”
Get government out of your refrigerator. The whole demeaning notion that people can’t make their own choices, good or bad, sickens me.
Happiness to a lefty sheeple is when all things are forbidden unless explicitly permitted by Big Brother.
Britain is farther gone than I suspected.
Cheese ad Bans??
Cheese, the new social evil?
Cheese “sin” taxes?
Cheese control agency enforces the legal cheese eating age limit?
Cheese, the enemy of the utopian state??
Hmmmmmmmm….and they brand those who hear the approaching foot steps of Big brother’s Jack boots “paranoid”?
“Let’s get this clear – no one’s banning any foods here. They are banning certain advertising. That’s a big difference, so treat it as such maybe?”
– Jonny, London
“Please remember, food is not being banned, merely the advertising of it to children … the government has fallen into the trap …”
– Canadian Kate (who I assume is not the owner of this blog)
Governments that make heavy handed proclamations that leave the [thinking] population nonplussed have not fallen into a trap; however those people that support, or apologize for such behavior have indeed been sucked-in.
Banning anything as innocuous as cheese adverts is social micro management of the first order….and any government in a free constitutional democracy engaging it it has breached its chartered raison d’être.
I wish people would stop apologising for government’s boorish intrusiveness and civil crimes.
I stand to be corrected but I have been told Canada has not increased its cheese import quota for 24 years. No one can just order an import shipment of any foreign cheese, one has to BUY an import quota from an existing quota. This is the reason prices are so high on cheese, lots of demand but limited supply.
Also, 90% of industrial milk in Canada-[presumably bought to make cheese} has to be made in Quebec. Also, no one can just start a cheese factory, one has to get permission.
So Canada, the great free trader, is not when it comes to protecting Quebec as the sole source of certain dairy products. Any comments? and what is the real truth?
“Venezuelan Beaver Cheese?
I’m not going to touch that one… I think even hinting at what it sounds like would be in extremely poor taste…”
I recently saw a documentary about the growing beaver population in Patagonia. Apparently it is speculated that the range of beavers in South America is extending northwards steadily. Perhaps by 2050 they will be in Venezuela (maybe busy damming up the Orinoco River).
Since beavers are mammals, it should be possible to produce cheese from them. If people will eat geitost, why not Patagonian beaver cheese? I expect it will start to show up in the natty little cheese boutiques sooner or later.
More on topic, though, isn’t this story depicting more or less what one would expect from the Labourite social engineers in the UK. I would expect it to appear soon on the Dipper agenda here in Canada, but I don’t think the Conservatives would touch it with a ten foot pole so we’re probaly safe for a while.
No big deal. We’ll soon have commercials alluding to ‘particular’ life-enhancing dairy products including but not limited to milk and, that if you want more information, please contact your local \ family grocer.
Ah, Great Britain. Now become the ultimate nanny state.
Flashback to Seinfeld’s Soup Nazi episode:
No cheese for you. NEXT!
Itlog95, I’m assuming that your use of the word “speculated” wasn’t intended as a pun… 😉
More on-topic: I cannot see any need to ban advertising cheese to kids. How does telling kids that cheese is available for purchase harm them?! Cheez!
I mean, how can that be any worse than all the bizarre sex-act stuff the public schools are forcing kids to learn about these days?
The more leftist and bureaucratic a society becomes, the more screwed-up its priorities become!
I think that Canada should step into the fore front and regulate this evil product, a Canadian Cheese Board as it were. What? We have one already? Never mind…
Re: Venezuelan Beaver Cheese, isn’t it tough to get the pail under them udders?
IMO, many of the nanny-state bureaucrats shaping these policies have toe cheese for brains.
🙂
Another piece of sheer stupidity in this is that kids don’t do the grocery shopping.
“Patagonian beaver cheese” – I love this blog.
aj: Stop advertising with Cheese!
HA!
…ya beat me to it!
The Cheese Shop sketch is available here: youtube.com/watch?v=pDat9zdw7Gs
Now, I happen to know a fair bit about cheese, because I love it and I’ve been studying it, and the amazing thing about cheese is that it is one of the best ways to eat protein and fat (lipolosis makes the fat more digestible). In addition, after lactolosis and proteolosis, that is, once lipolosis has begin, cheese actually kills the very bacteria that can make unpasteurized milk dangerous. Therefore, there’s no problem with cheese from unpasteurized milk as long as the cheese is over about two months old.
This is what’s so stupid about the regulationista — even if in some sense the mean well, they’re not actually connected to reality in the first place.
Anyway, I’ve some left over Appenzeller, Appleby Cheshire, Caerphilly, Colston Basset Stilton, Dubliner, Lancashire, Shropshire Blue, and Smoked Gruyere left over from our Christmas parties that I need to eat before it passes it’s prime, so I’d better sign off for now and get to it!
Can you get marmite and/or vegemite in Canada? I’m looking around, but no success yet.
well thanks Kate for finding something we can all agree on !!! LOL !!!
nuts!! their completely nuts over there !!!
texas canuck I have tasted Venezuelan old cheese, rather sharp and don’t care for it much, goes well with marmalade tho