With over 200 entries, we have a lot to choose from. Let’s begin with the Honourable Mentions:
“If you like your Crimea, you can keep your Crimea. Period.” – foobert
“As soon as I find my pen you’ll be sorry.” – WTF
“The Emperor Has No Xbox…” – Glenn
Next, our First Runner-Up;
“Thank You for calling the Surrender to Putin hotline. All of our Putins’ are currently busy. Your call is important to us. Please hold for the next available Putin.” – Robert in Calgary
And the winner is!
Congratulations to Anne (not from Cornwall). Send me an email and I’ll fix you up with a good book. You too, Robert.
Original March 8th post continues below
Contest closes Sunday at midnight. The winner will get their choice of a book from the SDA Free Book Library.
I miss you Reggie.
Global Warming is a fact, just like you can keep your doctor and health insurance if you like it … and if you do not believe me, then I will send the IRS to pay you a visit.
Look Vlad, this Ukrainian..er..ahh..situation is..ahh..making me look bad. What say you …ahh..umm..withdraw your troops and…ahh..er..I’ll make sure Ayers..umm..er..gives you a shout out in..er..ahh..my next autobiography..?..
You have a wooden horsey merry-go-round? OOOO that is so exciting! Reggie loves wooden horseys.
Let me see if I got this right……is it the reset button first, then the apology tour, or the apology tour, then the reset button? No, maybe it’s control-alt-delete…..argh!
“It’s been a long cold Russian-type winter here in Washington, Vladimir.
Go ahead and take Crimea, (I don’t care about all those old buildings and structures anyway), – just promise to keep the top Crimean golf courses open and we’ll hit the links in the Spring!
BTW, what’s your handicap?”
IMO you’ve got it batb, really spot on!
Sorry Vlad….gotta run. I’ve got a tee time at 10:00.
Hey Michelle.
Where are you gonna go on your next holiday?
Michelle?…Michelle?
Yoh Vlad; Bro gotta go Valeri’s punch and the bros have a tee time in 15. Can’t be late. Why don’t you just take the Crimea and quit interrupting me. I need to keep raisin more stash for the Mooch
“Really, they have proof that my birth certificate is a fake; what do we do now?”
“So I said the to IMF, THIS his how you milk the Ukraine. You gotta use both hands”.
“Where’s my smiley face?”
Yes, pineapple and ham, but no caviar. We’ll show those Russians.
OK, Vlad, maybe you’re right and what I’m saying doesn’t make any sense, but it’s because I’m so angry. … No, not at you, at Sarah Palin, and then I can’t relax, and then I can’t hold the phone and read both teleprompters at the same time.
Hey Pooty you get out , or I’m going to Crimea river
Screw the President and his tar pits, get ahold of the black chick I met up there; she has something to do with running the dam country.
Please be sure to let Tiger know that I’m still on holiday if he needs an interesting and good-looking Caddy.
“I call London.”
“I call France.”
“Vladdy Putin has poopie pants.”
Pajamagram? Yeah, I need two pair of red plaid Men’s at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue…
I want you to send a drone up there somewhere north of the 47th state to a place called Denial Saskabush and take out those Kanucks who are making fun of me.
Oops need a redo.
I want you to send a drone up there somewhere north of the 57th state to a place called Denial Saskabush and take out those Kanucks who are making fun of me.
This is as of post #174.
Kate- Still a problem.
Back a year or so ago, we corresponded concerning a quirk where when posts exceeded 50 and were continued to a second page, some of the first posts were lost. You raised the level to 150.
Eg- here, what shows as ‘1-150’ is not actually the first 150 posts, but rather the last 150 posts, and ‘Next’ is only those between 151 and 174, or the last 24. As new posts are added, more of the first ones are deleted.
Check for yourself. Right now the first post showing is by cdw100 @ 8:44 PM. It will be later when this appears.
Thought you should know…
Yes, 2 servings of Chicken kiev with a side order of prairie oysters.
Are you sure you gave my number to Tiger?
Vlad, I told you I’d have more flexibility, so here’s my grand plan for Crimea!
Empty chair my a$$ my obummer is set right down
Uh, OK, um, so I hold on to lectern and I look left. Then I look at the teleprompter and I look … where, again?
‘Bout that State dinner tonight … You sure I gotta use both?!? OK, OK, let’s go over it again … knife in the right, fork in the left, right?
When presidential multitasking reaches its limit at the bathroom.
Where in the world is it 3 AM?
So I got the hind tit in my left hand, right. And the front tit in my right hand, okay. And I squeeze? For how long?
Are you sure Forward to peace in our time is a good slogan
But Vlad, I did get my chipped tooth repaired.
Tell ’em I’m really, really mad; see I’m clenching my fists.
there should be a bonus prize for anyone who can zoom in on that phone and see if it is dialed into anything other than room service. I tried for a bit with a couple of photo editors but couldn’t resolve the display.
You know I like it when you use my nickname when talking dirty,so say it……whats my name? Oh yessssss……King Putt…..(shudders)
Yeah Hi Steve, Barry here, say, having some uhhhh, trouble here finding the uh, you know coffee, roll uhm, roll up spot?
If you really want to know how I keep milking the system like I’m doing here in Florida, just squeeze your people like a pair of teats on an overloaded loaded milk cow!
“But he doesn’t LOOK like Adolf Hitler”.
How did you get this phone #?
I’m on a no call list.
I’ll transfer you to Joe Biden ,he handles the duct cleaning issues.
Hello, Dominos?
com-on, you gotta have t-off times!
“Shaka, when the walls fell.”
Hello, Geiko? If things don’t go well, what’s our deductible?
Come-on Vlad. How do you think i got these ears in the first place
The Kremlin has nice hold music.
What do you mean they gave my tee time to Putin?
Go Vlad Go! Now I’ve got my flexibility!
“I am the Great Cornholio! I need TP for my bunghole!”
Yea, she was real pissed when I made that comment about her ass, so when I went to sleep, she Crazy Glued my damn fingers together.