The World Still Has Too Many Reporters

And you thought you had a rough week.

They only bite in self defence. Make of that what you will.

31 Replies to “The World Still Has Too Many Reporters”

Katipo, huh? That name is begging for a joke.
Just don’t want to see Bob Dole selling spiders.

Kate?
You owe me for one cup of coffee. LOL

And informed sources have revealed to the writer that this is the tip of the iceberg on spider bites. Rumour has it that this bite was not accidental and that possibly the spider was a trained spider whose services had been bought for the night.
Stay tuned. News as it happens!

Kate
So the unfortunate Canadian with the enlarged dick provoked that spider?
Syncro

The itsy bitsy spider went up the water spout.
Down came the rain, and washed the spider out.
Out came the sun, and dried up all the rain,
and the itsy bitsy spider went up the spout again.

Izzat what happened?

Is the sham-wow guy Canadian?

Foobert
More or less.
Syncro

Leaving lepidoptera…Please, don’t touch the display,
little boy, aha cute! Moving to the next aisle we have the
arachnids, the spiders, our…finest collection.
This friendly little devil is the heptothilidi,
unfortunately harmless. Next to him, the nasty licosa
raptoria, his tiny fangs cause creeping ulcerations of
the skin (laugh). And here, my prize, the Black
Widow. Isn’t she lovely?…And so deadly. Her kiss is
fifteen times as poisonous as that of the rattlesnake.
You see her venom is highly neurotoxic, which is to say
that it attacks the central nervous system causing
intense pain, profuse sweating, difficulty in
breathing, violent convulsions, loss of consciousness
and, finally uh Death. You know what I think I love the
most about her is her inborn need to dominate,
possess. In fact, immediately after the consummation
of her marriage to the smaller and weaker male of the
species she kills and eats him…(laugh) oh, she is
delicious…And I hope he was! Such power and dignity
…unhampered by sentiment. If I may put forward a
slice of personal philosophy, I feel that man has ruled
this world as a stumbling dimented child-king long
enough! And as his empire crumbles, my precious Black
Widow shall rise as his most fitting successor!

You guys know about the parasitic Amazonian Candiru fish, right?
Search for: “Candiru urethra”. You’ll be glad you did.

As someone who spent a week in hospital in Thailand as result of a spider bite (in Cambodia – on leg), I am not amused by frivolous reponse.
It was painful and my right leg swelled to 50% bigger.
When the Australian surgeon at the hospital said ” OK, we’ll check you in, put you on a drip and get some blood and do some tests”.
I replied: “Check in! No way, I don’t do hospitals”.
He said: “OK, no problem, but don’t blame me if you have to spend the rest of your life on dialysis”.
That’s why I spent a week in a Thai hospital because of a spider bite,

Warren…is that you?
Syncro
wallyj
Ummm…the sham wow guy is dead.

So now he has the ability to, ummm, spin webs with his pecker?
What kind of a costume would he wear?

I tend to delete penis enlargement spam emails assuming them to be scams, but this one might be worthwhile since it is organic.
Adding 3 inches is always a decent goal.

In other news…
Catsmeat spotted boarding a plane for overseas.

BTW, my title would have read: “Spider bites tourist down under.”

Isn’t this species also known as the ‘viagra’ spider?

OUCH (font 72)!

Isn’t this how Spiderman got his start?

Yea but, here in Canada Harper fired Gerguis way to fast is the headlines. The angry faces {msm pundits} who in Mar. were screaming for Gerguis’s head, are now screaming Harper was to quick and mean spirited with Helena. These pathetic morons classed as reporters, or mass tree killers as they are, should be forced to sit on street corners with megaphones again, like the criers of old, when swollen dicks become front page, the jig is up twits.

Crocodile Dundee: “You call that a knife? Now, THIS is a knife!”
Unlucky tourist: “You call that a….?”
Well, you get the picture.

So many reporters and so little news. . .

When I saw this it reminded me of a situation here a year or two back—ten actually—when we had the pleasure of being acquainted with the “eygptian” lady bug….numerous and aggressive.
They bit in self-defence. When they got inside your clothing and were subjected to pressure they bit.
You had folks riping off their shirts…grabbing their crotch and doing a jig.
Like slipping on a banana peel….it was only funny if you were an on-looker…
These lovey tropical fauna were the main reason why you ALWAYS dumped your boots out, shook your clothes well when dressing.
And then there were the @#$%^&* snakes….

Syncro either that was a very good guess or you had help.

Either way I’m impressed.

Hello. News flash. Men don’t “suffer” a swollen penis any more than they’d “suffer” being seduced by Pamela Anderson. Now the pain on the other hand . . .