The Chief Railroad Engineer for the Intergovernmental Panel On Atmospheric Sucking names a suspect;
Dr Pachauri, speaking to The Times on Saturday before travelling to Paris to brief President Sarkozy, suggested that the fossil fuel lobby could be behind a hacking incident last month that led to the publication of thousands of leaked e-mails between climate scientists. He said that it was entirely possible that “corporate interests” had had a hand in the leak.
In fact, the operation that has become known to the world as “Climategate” was, and is, being carried out as I speak by a vast network of operatives from a shadowy fossil fuel lobby known as SOMEONE IS DOING SEX TO ME! *
We number in the millions.
“At some point we will have to cross over and start sucking some of those gases out of the atmosphere.”
This isn’t a Michael Crichton novel we’re living in after all. It’s a Monty Python skit.
What a dill weed!
It’s becoming utterly laughable to hear the AGW zealots froth at the mouth as they blame “Big Oil” (95% of the time identified as Exxon Mobile (sic)) for conspiring to stymie the advance of the AGW agenda.
Hah! If you pay any attention to Big Oil at all, it’s quite clear that they have climbed aboard the AGW Express. Oil companies are run by practical realists, not ideologues, and they have sniffed the air and decided that they had better find a way to adapt to a Bizarro world where CO2 is deemed a pollutant. They also know that people are going to continue to use oil and gas; they will just have to pay more for it. Big Oil is actively working on ways to ensure that they get their share of the carbon tax lolly. Why else do you think that they are making plans here in Alberta to pump CO2 into depleted oil reservoirs? It’s a triple whammy: they can enhance oil recovery, claim carbon credits, and best of all, get project financing from not one, but TWO levels of government.
The oil companies will be sobbing all the way to the bank. Why should they try to kill the goose that lays such yummy golden eggs?
By the way, for Dr. Pachauri’s benefit (I have in my mind’s eye a vision of the late Peter Sellers playing his role.), we already have machines for taking CO2 out of the atmosphere. They are called “plants”. Just stuff a seed in the ground and stand back. Get ’em at the UFA, or even Canadian Tire.
Well there’s one way to reduce carbon emissions: Rajendra Pachauri is clearly too stupid to be permitted to go on breathing.
Railroaded to the “Hope ‘n Whoring” treaty.
But a great tragedy, it won’t be signed.
I just have this strange Luftschiffbau Zeppelin 129 Hindenburg type comment coming on…
“Oh the humanity!!!…..” the gas is coming out of the atmosphere!!!
Err I mean the great anthropogenic warming swindle has been discovered. What sort of rent seeking sham do we have to dream up now to line our trousers with lucre?
Hans-Christian Georg Rupprecht, Commander in Chief
1st Saint Nicolaas Army
Army Group “True North”
I’m reminded of the Monty Python skit when Karl Marx was being quizzed in a modern game show and he was so totally out of his element all his answers were regurgitated soundbites from his Communist Manifesto and had nothing to do with the questions. This is at least as bizzare.
OMG! Are these clowns for real? It’s as if their reading off an old script from a 50’s B-movie drive-in flick. We’re entering the realm of mutant creatures and spiders from Mars! What next you might ask? Why, only 10% of us are going to survive now unless we all join their deranged cult. And who should know better than one of the UK’s top mad scientists presenting the obligatory photo-shopped panorama of steam coming off cooling towers…surprise, surprise.
http://news.scotsman.com/latestnews/Warming-will-39wipe-out-billions39.5867379.jp
(h/t Sweetness & Light)
Obviously crazy people are taking us on a ride through the fun house and our Prime Minister should stop this freak show choo-choo train before it goes round the bend and extricate our country from this insane circus immediately.
What does this clown know about the climate? He is a Industrial Engineer. He has NO formal training regarding the climate or the environment. If you check most of the clowns on the ipcc they are not climate scientists at all they are mostly environmental activists who want us all to live in cabins and stop mutiplying. Don’t you know babies cause global warming, sick nuts these people are.
The following article must have been funded by the Fossil Fuel Lobby ™.
Carbon Dioxide in Greenhouses
http://www.omafra.gov.on.ca/english/crops/facts/00-077.htm
“The benefits of carbon dioxide supplementation on plant growth and production within the greenhouse environment have been well understood for many years.
“Carbon dioxide (CO2) is an essential component of photosynthesis (also called carbon assimilation). Photosynthesis is a chemical process that uses light energy to convert CO2 and water into sugars in green plants. These sugars are then used for growth within the plant, through respiration. The difference between the rate of photosynthesis and the rate of respiration is the basis for dry-matter accumulation (growth) in the plant. In greenhouse production the aim of all growers is to increase dry-matter content and economically optimize crop yield. CO2 increases productivity through improved plant growth and vigour. Some ways in which productivity is increased by CO2 include earlier flowering, higher fruit yields, reduced bud abortion in roses, improved stem strength and flower size. Growers should regard CO2 as a nutrient.”
Geez Sylan, all that productive stuff is so last year.
Really…who the heck would want stronger and higher-yielding plants when we could all be living and working in Algae-coated buildings?
All aboard the crazy train!!!
It just gets better every time.
This is the third version of this thing I have seen today.
This is the best, you will laugh, you will cry.
sylvan: How ironic that one arm of the Ontario government is correctly advertising the benefits of CO2, while the other is trying to “save the planet” by going along with the GW crowd’s call to reduce CO2. We are truely living in a Monty Python skit.
The Yukon newspapers, today screamed in big bold print “North (they like to say ‘north’ because it is bland, the Yukon is colorful) Not Ready for Climate Change”. They didn’t get the memo. Bagdad Bob has moved to an iceburg!
YEAH MONTY PYTHON COVERS IT.
Dr Pachauri…late of the Indian railways….
Not exactly the sharpest knife in the drawer…or he has lousy speech writers—from East Anglia no doubt…….
He is a civil engineer…..like civil law this is not a civil engineer….(Pun)….
Earlier he declared the IPCC process sound…”peer revued”…”transparent”….
HEE HEE HAW HAW HA HA HEE HEE HAW HAW HA HA
Recently he declared the Himilayan glaciers were melting at a catastrophic rate.
He was contradicted by his own government, India—which owns most of the Himilayan glaciers…..
India has agreed to limit emissions….if the rest of the world pays them enough….
Then there is the Chinese pledge to limit the INCREASE of their emmisions 35-45%…..wow..
“Growers should regard CO2 as a nutrient.”
The police recover propane powered CO2 generators from raided grow-ops all the time for good reason you know. 😉
I’m sucking oxygen, let the socialists suck carbon dioxide if they want.
Ok, I am a computer security specialist working for Chevron. They employed me overtime for the past 6 months to hack into the CRU mainframe.
After finding a vulnerable back door, I entered the site, downloaded all the data, and released them through a series of sites which trace safely trace back to someplace in Siberia.
Ok, Dr Pachauri, you fracking genius! You caught me and I admit my crime.
Next question: SO WHAT?
What part of me hacking into their database and revealing ACCURATE data and emails exonerates these climate fraudsters of bilking taxpayers out of BILLIONS of dollars, contaminating science with polluted methods, and steering the world on a course which will unnecessarily reduce production, employment, profits, wages, and quality of life?
You’re calling for punishment against a guy who broke into a house when, inside the house, he found 100 tortured and dismembered corpses. You are suggesting the people who lived in that house should not be investigated for murder.
Dr. Pachauri, it’s time to start focusing on the bigger crime here. Oh, but YOU are one of the criminals. That explains a lot.
O’s Capone and dog show.
…-
“Obama and the CRUddites of Britain
The CRU Crew of liars and scientific frauds of the UK have been driving the climate fraud campaign for years.
They shaped the corrupt and ridiculous IPCC UN report, designed to empower the Green Corruptocracy as the new international Ruling Class. Now that they have been finally, and devastatingly exposed to the world — including the British media, the BBC (reluctantly), the Guardian, the Times and the Telegraph, and the Daily Mail, which is smelling a huge scandal that will bring down the Labour Party (socialist). The one thing the Brits still pride themselves on is their world class science. The CRU crusade shows that science, too, has become pervasively corrupt and sick in New Socialist Britain.
By flying to the rescue in Copenhagen Obama is actually joining the exposed fraudsters, presumably to rescue his good buds of the Chicago Climate Exchange, which depends for survival on the passage of cap and trade legislation. The Chicago Way is going international, and Obama is its Prophet. All Hail Obama!”
So Copenhagen, here we come! And the whole world that’s been watching this — which includes all the English speakers on the web, maybe a billion people who can now read The BBC and The Guardian’s own confession — they can watch Obama tearing off the mask and appear as Obama Capone. Well, it’s justice on a grand scale. This is Watergate for the whole world.”
James Lewis (more)
http://www.americanthinker.com/2009/12/obama_and_the_cruddites_of_bri.html
Apart from being the ugliest person on the planet (not that there’s anything wrong with that}, Pachuari is also one of the stupidest. Very difficult to understand why this ugly, stupid, boorish and ignorant prick was given this job that he was totally unqualified for.
Just wonderin’?
What would it matter if “Big Oil” is behind the leak/hack? It doesn’t change the facts one iota.
jlc, since when has competence ever been a factor in U.N. hiring policy? The correct question is, who is he related to?
The Story of Mann:
as reported by The Daily Collegian, Penn State students:
Mann:
>>> “… the basic data on the surface temperatures comes from a common data source that is still available.”
Mann does not say where the “basic data”/”common data source” is stashed.
Mann is sitting on the “basic data”/”common date source”?
…-
“The missing data concerns surface temperatures from around the globe collected by a group within the University of East Anglia’s Climate Research Unit, Mann said. A lot of this work was done “decades ago” and wasn’t stored on a computer, he said.
“What they’re referring to is that some of the old adjustments are lost in files that disappeared into oblivion,” Mann said.
But, he said, the basic data on the surface temperatures comes from a common data source that is still available.”
“Climate theory e-mails missing”
http://www.collegian.psu.edu/archive/2009/12/01/climate_theory_emails_missing.aspx
I recall reading a sci-fi story some years ago – I think it was by Isaac Asimov, called ‘Nightfall’, in which it was thought the world was coming to an end. The people blamed the scientists and stormed the scientific institutions responsible.
I could see a real world version of this as a ‘teaparty’, but with the CRU and other enviro-politicians the target, rather than a government.
I was just contemplating the carbon footprint of a latte. From the farting cows, to the transportation of the milk products, to the pasteurization heating, to the packaging and delivery to the distribution center, thence to the coffee bar, and the steaming. And that’s just the milk. Let’s not overlook the cooling requirements through the supply chain either. Those have got to hurt.
Then there is the coffee bean itself – originating on a plant that requires CO2, by the way – which must find itself through the same distribution routes, to a place of roasting (OMG the carbon!) and grinding.
I am having a hard time thinking of a progressive beverage with a larger carbon footprint. For what it’s worth, having skim might reduce your own footprint, but is probably even worse for the planet because of the additional processing steps required to reduce the fat content, separate handling, equipment, and so forth.
My conclusion: you can’t be true progressive and drink latte at the same time.
This diatribe sponsored by Big Tea.
“I recall reading a sci-fi story some years ago – I think it was by Isaac Asimov, called ‘Nightfall’, in which it was thought the world was coming to an end. The people blamed the scientists and stormed the scientific institutions responsible.
I could see a real world version of this as a ‘teaparty’, but with the CRU and other enviro-politicians the target, rather than a government.”
We’ll call the novel “Sunrise” as light shines in on the fetid establishment of climate “science”.
It still isnt being explained properly, what the effect of this is, the pilfered data.
If there was a conspiracy behind it you would see a much more co-ordinated effort.
The carbonistas have been co-ordinating, and you can see right now the answer is, call the other side criminals while continuing to ignore them. Downplay it etc.
However, I suspect a few eyebrows have been raised in the scientific community, offends many of them and probably fits with what a few of them experienced. I know a couple of scientists who arent directly involved have avoided the area because it has long been identified as too political and not a safe environment to venture into, unless it is your lifeblood. Scientists who could contribute to the debate from related fields dont bother, places like, geology, solar and oceanography…their main research lay elsewhere and they dont want to hassle when their research points them in a different direction.
There will be attempts by the carbonistas to appoint one of their own to review the situation and pronounce it not serious, slap a wrist and say the core findings are still sound, but would everyone be a little nicer.
AGW may still be happenening, this scandal doesnt disprove it, but it the work done to date certainly doesnt prove that it is. What a waste of time, money and effort. They do need to be investigated, and fraud is criminal, but I would settle for professional discredit, as happened to Ponds and Fleischmann.
After they’ve sucked all the C02 from the air, they can go after the Si02 (Silicon Dioxide commonly called silica.)
That way they can get rid of the worlds’ computers that ate their data and be rid of those pesky “deniers” who will no longer be able communicate with each other on the internet.
This silicon dioxide is almost as bad as tree breathing C02. I just know it.
“let the socialists suck carbon dioxide if they want”
I’d prefer they sucked carbon monoxide but maybe that’s just the lack of coffee talking.
Some people just have to be locked in the asylums for preservation of our lives. That’s how it’s always been, but for some reason humankind had made a 180° turn.
It is interesting to observe that Russia and China are only obsessed with other countries’ carbon emissions. Is there a connection here, I wonder? Like, Putin, KGB…
For some odd reason the old prairie expression ‘his ass is sucking slough water’ comes to mind.
But I’m already doing my part in sequestering carbon from the atmosphere, I throw all my old newspapers in the landfill.
That way the carbon in them is stored there for decades without decomposing while a new tree grows and removes more carbon from the air.
If the tree was left in the forest it would likely burn up in a forest fire or die and decompose, either way the carbon ends up back in the atmosphere.
You can also sequester carbon in the walls of your house in the form of 2X4’s.
So save the planet, heave all your old newspapers in the landfill and use as many wood products as possible.
This has the added bonus of driving David Suzuki wild.
Now we know we’ve been railroaded.
Someone is doing sex to me..
(said in a chinese accent)… nice reference Kate!!!
Painting the highways a light colour will surely reduce Canadians carbon footprint, especially in the winter months. Unless all the highway fatalities insist on being cremated.
Flickin idiots.
Syncro
Here is the railroader and friends having a Nobel moment before da proof was da proof.
Warning: potty references.
I HACKED the CRU MAINFRAME!
We are leaving the future of the earth to a bunch of shadowy,unelected yahoos
It’s a conspiracy, unless it’s their conspiracy.
I would bet that there are plenty of scientists who knew it was a fraud, except they didn’t want to lose their grants, so sat silent …
All science is on trial , the world is watching now.
“Dr Pachauri raised the prospect of so-called geo-engineering”
Geo-engineering “scientists” in a sane world would have all the credibility of 9-11 “Truthers”.
In the 1970’s,fearing Global Cooling and the new Ice Age,remember that, they proposed coating the polar ice caps with soot to attract the sun’s rays. Last year,to combat Global Warming, they proposed covering all the planet’s deserts with a white thermal blanket,to reflect the sun’s rays.
They are the lunatic fringe of the scientific community, not to be confused with the criminal conspirators of the scientific community,or the outright fraudsters of the scientific community.
Btw, just how wide has the “fringe”become these days?
dmorris
It’s a veritable Fringe Festival.
Syncro
@Indiana:
I HACKED the CRU MAINFRAME!
This should be on a t-shirt. Lots and lots of t-shirts.
‘What does this clown know about the climate? He is a Industrial Engineer.’
Pachauri is also head of India’s TERI (Energy Resources Institute) … no vested interests there?
‘Btw, just how wide has the “fringe”become these days?’
Touche
Just as we figured….this just keeps getting better and better…or is it worse and worse????
More on Pachauri….
http://pajamasmedia.com/blog/climategate-imminent-demise-of-glaciers-due-to-a-typo/2/
Phil Jones today drama, reminds me of ACE-
This is double-paned sound-proof glass. There is no way that investigator could have heard Phil Jones scream about the climate changing emails with that door shut.
The scream we heard came from inside the AGW CRU building before he was thrown out of office and closed the door before he left.
YES. YES. YES.
Oh, YEAH. Can ya feel that, Phil?
Huh? Huh? Huh? Huh?
[mimics character from Poltergeist movie]
I have exorcised the Data Demons… this house is clear.
Looser- Looooser- Looser!
Phil-
What about my medallion of spiritual accomplishment?