I, For One, Welcome Our New Self-Driving Overlords

22 Replies to “I, For One, Welcome Our New Self-Driving Overlords”

1. Ah, hahahaha. Hahahaha.

2. My name is HAL .com 2100!
   I control your coumperTelsa Auto Piolet SysAtem.

   Russian hackers are testin to see if ! will votes against Trump again

   Please call my serves control! Center.

   1. My name is HAL .com 2100!
      I control your coumperTelsa Auto Piolet SysAtem.
      Russian hackers are testin to see if I will votes against Trump again
      Please call my serves control! Center.
      pluZe wakeupp and call

3. The link to the story is non-functioning. Here is the url: https://www.sun-sentinel.com/local/palm-beach/delray-beach/fl-ne-tesla-autopilot-lawsuit-20190801-zokyrcqxz5cn7jpjeenaoud6iy-story.html

4. So there’s one less Communist in the world. What’s not to like?

   Now if only someone would hack the Tesla and publish the details, one might be able to drive a batch of them right through Antifa!

   And before you start to screech “Florida Man”, my bet is that they’re from some sewage hive.

   1. “So there’s one less Communist in the world. What’s not to like?”

      What an incredibly stupid a-hole thing to say.

   2. SECOND THAT.

5. Darwin performing as usual. There used to be stories of people trustin their lives to cruise control to pilot their vehicle. Stupid people will never run out of ways to kill themselves.

   1. And then there is this….

      Tesla issuing fix for potentially dangerous ‘Dog Mode’ flaw

      https://www.foxnews.com/auto/tesla-issuing-fix-for-potentially-dangerous-dog-mode-flaw

      Any dog-lover who would entrust their pet’s life to Musk’s technology probably shouldn’t have a dog. How long before some of the same idiots who believe Tesla cars can drive themselves trust this feature to protect their children left in a car in hot weather, too?

      Oh well, I guess the ‘Darwin awards’ are still just as effective when you don’t kill yourself through your own stupidity, just your children.

6. The big question for me isn’t how poorly the self-driving systems perform. The big question is what are the drivers doing when the car is on auto-pilot. The auto-makers say you have to be paying attention to the road. But the drivers are doing everything but paying attention. That should scare everyone who is not on auto-pilot.

   Right now the law suits are drivers versus auto-makers. Eventually they will be victims in non auto-pilot cars versus drivers using auto-pilot. The assumption is that auto-pilot systems don’t make mistakes. Who do you sue when a car on auto-pilot crashes into you?

7. Something else doesn’t add up. 1600 feet AFTER the impact? Even if one assumes the car was simply rolling on the tires, the ability to roll 1600 feet after using up the very considerable energy required to shear the roof indicates a very high pre-impact speed.

8. A dead computer programmer. Maybe he worked for reCAPTCHA.

9. “The Autopilot system failed,…”

   Oh did it? Some would say that the driver’s carbon footprint has been successfully reduced.

10. One wonders whether or not the legal profession will kill the driver-less car phenomenon. It is the sworn duty of trial lawyers to make the world safe for morons while enriching themselves. Anyone who would put their their life in the faith of software that needs constant patches and upgrades to navigate a freeway or urban driving conditions falls into that category IMHO.

    1. Nothing will kill the driverless car phenomenon. Remember “get a horse”?

11. Much like cars, self-driving systems will have accidents and considerable loss of life. They will then be accepted en masse and become the new normal.

    1. No one is stopping you from using Tesla murder pilot

12. “driven by 50-year-old Jeremy Banner”
    nope. ’twas HAL2019 driving it, er, ‘driving’ it, er, sitting along for the ride perplexed
    about things like big semis and road surfaces.

    some people are ‘pioneers’ in a different way . . . . . .

    note there’s always a lawyer ready to sue.

13. ‘A Fool and his head are soon parted’.

14. They needs to lose. He accepted the electric car subsidy from the government. He legally accepted the risk. He, his family, all his friends get to stew in the stench of their own galactic stupidity.

    I mock them. I despise them. I wish financial ruin on them. I hope they are all stupid enough to keep buying Teslas. I hope they all die much worse deaths as the result of their own poor life choices.

    I HOPE FOR LESS DEMOCRAT VOTERS.

    1. It would be truly hilarious if a Tesla plowed through a pride parade and caused more deaths than Boston.

15. Hubris: -1
    Nemesis: +1