22 Replies to “We Don’t Need No Flaming Sparky Cars”

  1. Over the river and through the woods,
    to grandmothers house we go.
    The Tesla knows the way,
    to carry the batteries,
    to the very next super CHARGE-err

    Over the river and through woods,
    Oh screw it, it’s too cold, and range anxiety made us stay home and order-in Chinese.
    Screw Thanksgiving, it’s disrespectful to native populations anyway …

    The “modern” take on a classic, traditional, Thanksgiving poem.

  2. Could you not hook up some kind of generator to a bicycle and charge it yourself? Bicycles are the only way to save mother Earth.

    1. Use Uber Rickshaw. It would save energy, provide transportation for elderly and disabled, and would provide meaningful jobs for Arts graduates.

    2. “Could you not hook up some kind of generator to a bicycle and charge it yourself? ”

      You can indeed do this, and it would work as well as you’d think it would. The problem is conservation of energy; you have almost none, and the car is heavy. If the Tesla had pedals in the floor, or a hole in it à la Flintstones, you could propel it at a few miles an hour – if you were on good, flat pavement and the wind isn’t in your face. Drop a wheel off the shoulder or into a deep enough pothole, you’re stuck there – you are not strong enough to pedal the car out. And your bicycle generator has your few-tenths of a horsepower turning it, therefore generating so few amps that it’d take you all day and night charging the battery to push the car ten miles at a very low speed.

      To illustrate this, imagine hitching your bicycle to the front of the car with a rope and towing it somewhere – that’s what you’re up against.

  3. Obviously. Teslas are toys for wealthy parasites.

    In the brave new green world, the proletariat are expected to board buses and trains crawling with lunatics, thieves and rapists, and invariably in dangerous disrepair.

    1. “Obviously. Teslas are toys for wealthy parasites.”

      Yup. Pretty much. And if you wanted an adjective you could throw in virtue-signalling.

      1. Ottawa’s city fathers can get back to us on that when the LRT is no longer an obvious lemon.

        Jim the Fairy had clearly been hoping to ride the O-train back to Queen’s Park as Liberal leader. The only good thing that’s come of the O-train farce is that that’s not going to happen.

  4. And on the related subject of corporate virtue signalling, have you seen the Petro Canada ad that says you can now drive your tax-payer subsidized buggy across Canada? Well, here’s the rest of that story…the part that wasn’t mentioned. What a noble, selfless company, eh?

    “Bill Casey, Member of Parliament for Cumberland–Colchester, on behalf of the Honourable Amarjeet Sohi, Canada’s Minister of Natural Resources, today announced a $4.6-million investment for Petro-Canada, a Suncor business, for building 92 electric vehicle (EV) fast chargers in its coast-to-coast network.”

    https://www.canada.ca/en/natural-resources-canada/news/2019/07/canada-invests-in-cross-country-electric-vehicle-fast-charging-network0.html

    1. What happened to “If you build it, they will come?” Now, if Petro-Canada really wanted to virtue signal, they’d make a point of refusing the government handout with a statement to the effect of, “We believe in doing this thing, so we’re putting our own money into it. We don’t believe that government should be wasting taxpayer money on a private business venture, no matter how noble.” The type of politicking that hits both sides of the debate.

      I really wish more people would get on board with the concept of getting government out of the business of being in business, though. So many problems could be avoided by reducing the amount of interference in the daily lives of everyday citizens.

      1. You have just described Canada’s national sickness . The majority rationalize over and over again corporate control of national policies, and hence, the current political LibCon political class. The entire business class in Canada is very little different from the dairy farmers who thrive at the expense of the nation.

      2. Canadians want more not less government interference in their lives.
        But even more, they want the government to interfere with all those “other” Canadians they disapprove of.

        1. Yup. That’s the problem. It’s not just for themselves, it’s for the good of others. “And don’t you dare contradict what I think is better for you.” And that sort of mindset usually leads itself down one of two path for silencing its opponents: you’re either dumb, or you evil (based on whatever metric), so they’re always justified in enforcing their will on you.

      3. Perish that thought ACM…and put it in those new Liberal sponsored cooling units that both you and I bought for Loblaws Inc.

        1. – Oh and, haw haw. I read an article a while ago wherein a guy drove his EV from London to Edinburgh, just because. It took him four days – almost all of which was spent sitting in truckstops for ten hours at a stretch, waiting for the battery to charge. A commenter mentioned that in the 1800’s, a stagecoach could do the trip in half that time.

          And that’s London to Edinburgh, where they don’t get all that much freezing weather. Now imagine doing it from Calgary to Edmonton in the dead of winter at -30.

          1. – And to carry-on the farce, I think it was Car Craft that did an article where they did a 500-mile race; a Model T one guy had, versus somebody else’s uncle’s Tesla. The Tesla won, despite at least one recharge – but only because the guys driving the Model T ended-up dead halfway up a long hill, and had to figure-out “what now?”

            They somehow found somebody in the dead of night, miles from nowhere, who could rebuild a Model T carb and who had the parts on a shelf, so they got back on the road with a lengthy delay. They subsequently confessed that they’d’ve beaten the Tesla hands-down, if they’d only known a little factoid of how to drive a Model T; the gas tank is under the driver’s seat and there’s no fuel pump, so it would not climb a long hill without suffering fuel starvation. They thought they had a mechanical problem – but in those days, people going uphill in a Model T would turn the car around and then reverse-up the hill, to maintain fuel flow to the carb.

    2. Jamie, petro can is Sunoco, and they sell Sunoco 94 which I use in my sports car which has a puffer on it

  5. only in californicate !!!
    for now, soon to be on the entire gawdforsaken continent.
    does this mean we’re headed back to the days of horse and buggy to get around?

  6. Noticed a charger with a Tesla attached at long-term airport parking last Friday. We, a small town way-station on I80, have a huge electric car charger array in a new big box shopping area. While there are a few Tesla’s and other smugmobiles in town, the array generally stands empty. I did see two Tesla’s there one afternoon.

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