January 17, 2008

Could This Be the Worst Ever

... military ad ... my, how the mighty have fallen:

At Celestial Junk we posted some slightly better material a while back ... link to your favorites in the comments.

Posted by Cjunk at January 17, 2008 5:19 PM

a different kind of combative

Posted by: cal2 at January 17, 2008 5:35 PM

Works for me. Where do I enlist in the Ukrainian Army? I want a guarantee on the chicks though.

Posted by: John B at January 17, 2008 5:43 PM

From what I could understand they said something about a contract.
Maybe you jon the military by some contract?
My parents spoke Slovak. This was Ukranian I think.

Posted by: gl1800 at January 17, 2008 6:01 PM

Chick: Here, drink this, that will cure you of "Sleazei-tis-Eurotrash-itis" Oops, that didn't work.

Chick: "Hey, you've actually got teeth"
Soldier: "yeah baby, eight years salary and selling my grandmother on the black market paid for them."

Posted by: Doug at January 17, 2008 6:01 PM

g1800: They are indeed Ukranian ... I speak Czech, but can only pick out a few words. The term they use for the girls is the one Czechs use for very young women ... it's an endearing term. I think the girls are all rushing off to join up ... it looks like it's a volunteer force much like ours if that's the case.

Note the guy strokes his "gun" just before he hops off the APC.

Posted by: Paul2 at January 17, 2008 6:06 PM

Chick 1: "Ooooh that's such a nice, pretty beret you have soldier boy!"

Soldier 1: "Yeah mama, I sold my soul to Uncle Putin for it, you like?"

Posted by: Doug at January 17, 2008 6:15 PM

Loser Guy: "Hey, where are all you pretty mamas running?"

Chicks: "We want to pull plow for Private Borat!"

Posted by: Doug at January 17, 2008 6:20 PM

To those trying to figure it wife is Russian and can, thus, understand about 80% of the words.

Basically, it is an ad trying to make a big point of showing off that the Ukranian military is no longer the decrepid old Soviet-style army where everyone is drafted (and thus a soldier is nothing more special than any other 18 year-old kid who is there by force). Instead, it is flashy and new and the modern soldier is there as a sort of "contracted" free agent - which is, presumably more respectable and less ho-hum than the way it used to be.

This is much more appealing to the ladies than even a flashy businessman...yadda yadda yadda.

Posted by: bryceman at January 17, 2008 6:29 PM

Check this one out:

It's not an ad, but a tribute ... I don't know whether to laugh or cry ... or enjoy the new dance steps.

Posted by: Paul2 at January 17, 2008 6:32 PM

Shades of SCTV, only without the production values.

Who booked that Ad? Prickly?

Posted by: Jon at January 17, 2008 6:38 PM

Well the Ukranians have some catching up to do.

The "Girls of the Israeli Defense Forces" over at Youtube.


Posted by: Hans Rupprecht at January 17, 2008 6:42 PM

stevePerhaps...sorry looks more like Rick Mercer...the quintesential leftard from the Rock. And you haven't got the guts to sign up!!

Posted by: Justthinkin at January 17, 2008 6:44 PM

Hey it's all about getting the girls....isn't it?

The Swedes have a military? Really? teehee

Posted by: Joanne at January 17, 2008 7:18 PM

Ahhh beautiful women on sale now for $ for you

Posted by: Rednik at January 17, 2008 7:55 PM

Yes, the Swedes have a military, and while it is small, and Sweden is ... not forceful in its foreign policy, they can use it. THey forced a Soviet submarine to surface in the 70s after they caught it in their territorial waters.

Posted by: Ed at January 17, 2008 7:57 PM

"The Swedes have a military? Really? teehee"

Posted by: lberia at January 17, 2008 7:57 PM

lberia, being the pacifist Leftist you are, you've obviously never heard of the Swedish Bofors canon.

or the Saab Gripen fighter jet

Posted by: Doug at January 17, 2008 8:10 PM

The Swedish Forces are about the same size as...

the Canadian Forces.

Posted by: JJM at January 17, 2008 8:53 PM

"Oh, no! Uzbeks drank my battery fluid!"

Posted by: rg at January 17, 2008 8:57 PM


I think I dimly remember a fantasy along these lines before joining up.

Today I guess I would have to explain to the new military personnel that feminine companionship can be available(ahem), but this almost always involves remuneration as an exchange of value.

Whether this would be the enticement that the young combatant was looking for is something I cannot say.

Posted by: Greg in Dallas at January 17, 2008 10:21 PM

lberia, being the pacifist Leftist you are, you've obviously never heard of the Swedish Bofors canon.

Posted by: Doug at January 17, 2008 8:10 PM


Wake up Doug,iberia isn't a pacifist,POS like him just want Western Civilisation to lose.

He's all FOR our warlike enemies.


Posted by: Mr.g at January 17, 2008 10:48 PM

"Join the Ukranian Army and hot women will have sex in your backyard"

Posted by: AncientOfDays at January 17, 2008 11:49 PM

... and all the pirohy and borsch you can eat and vodka you can drink ... greaaat contract, where do I sign up ... LOL

Posted by: Boris at January 18, 2008 12:03 AM

No, this is the worst military ad ever:

Posted by: Hans at January 18, 2008 12:20 AM

Gee, and I thought the guys took off 'cause it was another "Don't spread AIDS" commercial.

Posted by: DrD at January 18, 2008 12:22 AM

Doug, Mr.g: If you only knew what Kate knows.

Anyway, there's nothing bad about being a pacifist...after all, Christ was one.

Posted by: lberia at January 18, 2008 12:33 AM

Fresh new shipment of socks just arrived from Gray Sock World.

Posted by: Bernie at January 18, 2008 12:41 AM

Iberia, I wouldn't be so sure. Consider Matthew 10, for example:

34"Do not suppose that I have come to bring peace to the earth. I did not come to bring peace, but a sword. 35For I have come to turn
" 'a man against his father,
a daughter against her mother,
a daughter-in-law against her motherinlaw—
36a man's enemies will be the members of his own household.'

It is true that Jesus was in favor of peace, and urged people to live in harmony and love each other, but he was no hippy saying "peace, man" while holding up two fingers. His actions against the money-changers in the temple (Mark 11) are another example.

Posted by: Alex VanderWoude at January 18, 2008 12:51 AM

Paul 2
The dance step is Pinan 1, a Shorin-Ryu kata, poorly done I might add.

Posted by: Pat at January 18, 2008 3:23 AM

Doug: That takes me back.......about 45 years ago, living in Australia, I heard a politician talk about OZ's northern defences......he said all they had taking care of the top half were a couple Bofors guns in Darwin, and those, he commented, "Had never been known to hit anything".

Posted by: Nemo2 at January 18, 2008 7:36 AM

BTR with KPVT heavy machine gun, just like one Russia supplied Abbas with.

Posted by: Aaron at January 18, 2008 9:33 AM

Those wondering about Sweden ... here's a rough guide to military ranking:

I think Sweden has the overall edge over Canada. Keep in mind that the ranking is focused on total numbers, and not quality of equipment.

Posted by: Paul2 at January 18, 2008 10:18 AM

Doesn't Ukraine have a draft? This is fake.

Posted by: Freaky Dude at January 18, 2008 11:00 AM

Even though it's a dead thread:

No, Christ was NOT a pacifist. That's a revelation of your lack of knowledge of Christianity.

Posted by: Doug at January 18, 2008 1:55 PM

"It is true that Jesus was in favor of peace, and urged people to live in harmony and love each other, but he was no hippy saying 'peace, man' while holding up two fingers. His actions against the money-changers in the temple (Mark 11) are another example."

Indeed. Christ is neither a "pacifist" nor a "revolutionary" nor a "socialist" nor an "activist." He consistently defies all attempts at such pidgeon-holing from all sides of the political spectrum.

To atheists, he's a myth.

To agnostics and United Church members (is there a difference?) he was some socially concerned humanistic chap who lived long ago.

To Jews, he was an eccentric home-schooled rabbi and leader of a small Jewish cult.

To Muslims, he was a prophet.

To Christians he can only ever be one thing: God Incarnate, the Son of Man, the Messiah.

Posted by: JJM at January 18, 2008 4:06 PM

I think it rocks. Chicks dig big guns. Hey the target is not girls, but boys.

Posted by: donsurber at January 20, 2008 9:49 AM

The US Marines Corps new commercial - shown this weekend during the Playoff games and on "American Idol"

very moving...

Posted by: fmfnavydoc at January 21, 2008 12:23 AM

My sons are from Transylvania, and the style of the ad is similar to Romanian ads. Eastern Europe didn't really see much advertising until 1990, and not in quantity until 2000, so they don't have the same barriers and filters that we developed over the years.

Posted by: Assistant Village Idiot at January 21, 2008 3:52 PM