November 2, 2004

Foreign Monitors Report

Global monitors find faults like:

...less access to polls than in Kazakhstan ... fewer fail-safes than in Venezuela... [not as] simple as in the Republic of Georgia

.... ?

Oh! Oh! Oh! It's a game! My turn:

Fewer AK-47's than Brazil, more women than Saudi Arabia and more eh... ballots than China.

Feel free to join in the fun in the comments section.

Posted by Kate at November 2, 2004 9:28 PM

Fewer thumbscrews than Uzbekistan! Fewer RPG explosions than Tajikistan! Fewer rioting university students than South Korean! More snacks than North Korea!

Posted by: Bill Walsh at November 2, 2004 10:45 PM

Less cheese odor than in France.

Posted by: Cool Dood at November 2, 2004 10:49 PM

-less anti-americanism than in Germany
-less likely to result in a coup d'etat than Ivory Coast (I was there when it happened)
-not as sophisticated than France

Posted by: Tex at November 2, 2004 11:00 PM

More teeth than Britain.

Posted by: Greg Wright at November 2, 2004 11:05 PM

Fewer small dead animals than in Chernobyl.

Posted by: Claus at November 2, 2004 11:13 PM

Fewer dead white guys than Zimbabwe!

(Congrats Kate - you got linked by Mark Steyn!)

Posted by: King Richard at November 2, 2004 11:19 PM

More ankles showing than in Iran.

Posted by: Justzumgai at November 2, 2004 11:25 PM

Less disregard for the will of the people than in the EU. Less "nuance" than in France. ("Nuance" being a French synonym for "bribed present and/or past public official".)

Posted by: David J Crook at November 2, 2004 11:27 PM

No candidate with as decisive a majority as Saddam Hussein.Too many candidates running for president, one is enough.

Posted by: Rob at November 2, 2004 11:30 PM

less likely to forget manners and "bitch-slap" whining, hypercritical (less than welcome) global minotors.

Posted by: OVERITNTX at November 2, 2004 11:38 PM

Less frantic gesturing than Italy. Fewer Poles than Poland. Not as boring as Canada.

Posted by: Tim at November 2, 2004 11:40 PM

Less definitive than Saddam's election, remember 99%?

Posted by: Dredded Boink at November 2, 2004 11:53 PM

Less accident prone than the van Gogh family.

Posted by: Paul at November 3, 2004 5:56 AM

"The United States is also nearly unique in lacking a unified voter registration system or national identity card, Gould said, adding that he would ideally require U.S. voters to dip a finger in an ink bowl or have a cuticle stained black after voting."

Or having a limb severed or your daughter gang raped in the days prior to the election, as is routine in some african states.

Posted by: Arty at November 3, 2004 7:52 AM

It's a pretty sad little "report", isn't it? Typically, there's a Canadian involved....

Posted by: Kate at November 3, 2004 8:33 AM

I am not witty enough to continue the thread, but you have made my morning!!! Excellent!! Kudos to one and all and "Thanks for your support!"

Freedom and Whiskey!

Posted by: Faffnir at November 3, 2004 9:15 AM

More EU monitors than Darfur.

How many of these monitors plan on being observers for the upcoming Iraqi elections? Every Ohioan they meet ought to be asking them this question.

Gotta hand it to those Euros, they have an unerring ability to know where they're needed...

Posted by: Paul H. at November 3, 2004 11:51 AM

More free will and democratic control than the rest of the freakin' world combined!

Posted by: Penny Williams at November 3, 2004 12:31 PM

Less ennui than in Tom Daschle.

Posted by: Just Some Guy at November 3, 2004 12:40 PM

More churches than in Saudi Arabia. (oh wait, they don't have any. ok, neither do they vote)

Posted by: George at November 4, 2004 9:56 AM

Ms. McMillan,

If your site had not crashed -for hours- under the Steynalanche, our Report might neither have been "sad" nor "little" and certainly not """...""".

We shall never know what the 10,000 missing entries would have revealed. It is a FACT that more voters were rain-soaked in Boston(!) than Kandahar, and even as we post, mr.Dan Rather is reading (copies of) the 11/2 weather charts for the Massachusetts area. WE DONīT THINK THIS IS OVER.


A European Monitor

Posted by: Flatscreen19" at November 4, 2004 8:04 PM