I, Nicoleon

In a SHOCKING turn of events, Nicola Sturgeon has resigned as first minister of Scotland. The search is on to replace her with someone even worse.

In a shock decision, Scotland’s longest-serving first minister said she had instructed the Scottish National party (SNP) to begin the process of electing a new leader and would remain in office until her successor is chosen.

Her resignation, which many had suspected could happen nearer the next Holyrood election in 2026, triggered speculation about her successor. Bookmakers quickly tipped Angus Robertson, the SNP’s former Westminster leader and now Sturgeon’s cabinet secretary for culture and external affairs, as the lead candidate.

The SNP leader has had a series of political setbacks recently, including the UK supreme court defeat of her plans for a fresh independence referendum and a damaging row over a double rapist being sent to a female jail after announcing she was a trans woman.

Related: Thousands of transgender inclusivity badges left unused in Scotland after staff snubbed scheme

20 Replies to “I, Nicoleon”

  1. It is depressing to hear of tyrants falling everywhere else in the world knowing we are stuck with dear leader for life here in turdholistan. Good for Scotland though, nicola will not be missed.

    1. I think the Head Turd of the Canadian Penal Colony smells something amiss.
      He travels heavy now with Special Forces snipers and lots of RCMP bed wetters. Like a convoy of 20 SUV’s.
      He is hated all over Canada.

    2. The stakes are higher here in Canadia, that’s why Blackie will stay put to continue his rampage throughout the Institutions of this once illustrious country.

  2. Another strict Covid Queen like Ardhern. I think they know justice is coming.
    At this point Vigilante Justice is fine too.

    1. I agree! Perhaps they realize that there will be a repeat of the Romanian Revolution in which they and their spouses will be lined up against a wall and shot!

  3. It would be nice to know more details. Do these Bolsheviks have a weakness, or do they just fold up when their food taster gets a flux of the bowels?

  4. Don’t know much about them Scots.
    What happened to them?
    Are they reading 1984 as an instruction book as opposed to warning about society sliding into the abyss?

    1. Look at the so called tough guy Aussies. What a joke.
      Who led the charge as always? Canadians, ordinary Canadians.
      Freedom Convoy. Do it again Canada.

  5. another way to say communism= SCOTISH!
    Worked at Orenda for a while, all scots, and all socialist pr*cks!

  6. “In a SHOCKING turn of events, Nicola Sturgeon has resigned as first minister of Scotland. The search is on to replace her with someone even worse.”

    And here I thought the search was on to replace her with someone who had a fishy last name:

    Salmond, Sturgeon… any budding Scottish politico named Herring or MacKerle out there?

  7. Separatists. Same the world over. All socialist imbeciles with a grade 4 grasp of math and a grade 1 grasp of economics.
    SNP, Bloc Quebecois, Basques, Plaid Cymru….

  8. I think it was Scott Adams who said “Americans are a reasonable, tolerant people…until they aren’t.”

  9. Good riddance to the wee ginger runt. Bunch of snivelling whiners – they’re the Quebecois of the UK. And yes, I’m of Scottish extraction, too, in case you ask.

  10. In defining worse,there is a need to distinguish effectiveness from sensible. Sturgeon was effective though her main policy objectives of independence and climate control are complete nonsense. Her successor will likely be equally unhinged with respect to the policies but there is a hope he/she/it will be a bumbler, which will be far more likely to lead to the SNP departing from power. However, the alternative in Scotland in practical terms is Labour and the only difference is they don’t advocate independence. wrt the rest of it – climate alarmism, state control of everything, lockdowns, digital id etc – they are completely on the same page as the SNP. Slàinte Mhath.

  11. It’ll be like New Zealand, where Ardern was succeeded by her male equivalent (minus the choppers)… And the horrifying thing is, that’s the best that could be hoped for there!

    I have to end with that wonderful quote from the Critical Drinker about Sturgeon: “…our first minister for example, who’s both a highly successful politician and a woman, and yet effortlessly manages to look like neither”!

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