I Thought I’d Only Go Blind

‘Right-handed man’ almost masturbates to death: medical case study

This fellow redefined “mind-blowing sex” after he suffered a life-threatening stroke while repeatedly masturbating. Now, medical experts are saying he’s lucky he escaped the ultimate unhappy ending.

He should have used his left hand.

19 Replies to “I Thought I’d Only Go Blind”

    1. The same reaction I’m sure when you’ve finished painting a happy face on your left hand.

  1. So that old joke about doing it “till you go blind” isn’t so far-fetched after all.

    1. I used the GI bill to pay for college and also worked at the fishing pier baiting customers fish hooks.
      After a year at the pier, I studied, & worked hard to become a MasterBaiter.
      With 2 degrees, guess which one gives me the most satisfaction?

  2. Hey, Prinz Dummkopf! You might want to pay attention to this and you know why…..

  3. My left hand just jumped in a cab fcuked off and didn’t leave a forward address.

  4. Its just your brain gettin’ even with your dick for deceiving it.
    Remember that the brain is in a closed box and relies on all the other body parts to give it the straight goods.
    It doesn’t appreciate it when certain body parts f**k around with it.
    Its an uppity organ and isn’t beyond committing kamakazee if it feels its being messed with.

  5. As a young fellow, the British author John Mortimer was warned that he would go blind if he did that, so he decided to do it just until he was short-sighted.

  6. Wait. If he was using his right hand how was he controlling the mouse?

    Ummm…

    Asking for a friend…

    Honest…

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