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What Would We Do Without Researchers?

By Kate on January 30, 2015 10:29 AM | 13 Comments

13 Comments

Mystery Meat | January 30, 2015 10:43 AM | Reply

"Was it a lifestyle that caused the trauma that led to early death?"

Duh.

Martin B. | January 30, 2015 10:52 AM | Reply

Popcorn research that apologetically supports the old Viking adage: You reap with a hammer's blow...and that girly men live longer.

Frank Q. | January 30, 2015 10:56 AM | Reply

"Skull fractures can lead to an early death, even if the victims initially survived the injuries...."

Heaven forbid that those injuries were caused by playing hockey with the Danish Nationalized Hockey Team. I'm sure that their children were kept from playing the game until the helmet was invented.

Those helmets are yet to be discovered by the "researchers".

jcl | January 30, 2015 11:04 AM | Reply

That story came from The Onion, right? Right?

nold | January 30, 2015 11:17 AM | Reply

So if my buddy Og caves my skull half in with a sledgehammer does that mean I won't get to see my offspring graduate from fire-making school?

NME666 | January 30, 2015 11:43 AM | Reply

wait till they dig up KFK's skull, that injury really hurt!!!

Snagglepuss | January 30, 2015 12:54 PM | Reply

Naw. That's really a modern liberal's skull. Implosion due to vacuum! If you really checked beneath the Turd's mane, you'd have undeniable proof.

Mike | January 30, 2015 2:55 PM | Reply

Getting clubbed in the head is bad for you. Got it.
Thank God they told me that, I was just about to go to a head-clubbing convention.

ldd | January 30, 2015 4:41 PM | Reply

Wonder if getting hammered by wine has been considered the source for some of these dents.

Aviator | January 30, 2015 5:03 PM | Reply

And now we know why most Vikings wore those little tin hats with the horns on the sides. The bare-headed dumb ones became subjects for this study.

Spurwing Plover | January 30, 2015 7:13 PM | Reply

Hitting themselves over the heads with their weapons

enkidu | January 30, 2015 7:15 PM | Reply

I didn't see a tie-in to Global Climate Hysteria, however did they get funding?

peterj | January 30, 2015 9:49 PM | Reply

Somewhere in that jewel of a report I thought I saw workplace violence as a possibility for the cranial damage. In hindsight though, I must have been dreaming as it was not intended as comedic entertainment.

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peterj: Somewhere in that jewel of a report I thought I read more
enkidu: I didn't see a tie-in to Global Climate Hysteria, however read more
Spurwing Plover: Hitting themselves over the heads with their weapons read more
Aviator: And now we know why most Vikings wore those little read more
ldd: Wonder if getting hammered by wine has been considered the read more
Mike: Getting clubbed in the head is bad for you. Got read more
Snagglepuss: Naw. That's really a modern liberal's skull. Implosion due to read more
NME666: wait till they dig up KFK's skull, that injury really read more
nold: So if my buddy Og caves my skull half in read more
jcl: That story came from The Onion, right? Right? read more

What Would We Do Without Researchers?

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13 Comments