Let's All Just Pee Sitting Down

Holly came from Miami, F-L-A
Hitchhiked her way across the U-S-A
Plucked her eyebrows on the way
Shaved her legs and then he was a she
She says hey babe, take a walk on the wild side
Said hey honey, take a walk on the wild side

.....

And the colored girls go
Doo, doo doo, doo doo, doo doo doo...

.....

"Let's All Just Pee Sitting Down"

No, we'll just get you one of these:

http://www.amazon.com/Whiz-Freedom-Reusable-Female-Director/dp/B0011BNA9K

Just another day in the so-called life of a beta male...

My wife gets upset if I sprinkle when I tinkle so now I have to go outside behind the grain truck.

In my home we use a novel plan around the piss splatter issue. Whoever splatters cleans it up. Keep some Mr Clean and a rag under the sink. It's really an easy thing to deal with if you aren't a useless Leftist tool.

Cleaning up the spatter?
That's why God invented mens' socks.
One quick wipe of the foot and it's as clean as a whistle.

There seems to be consensus amongst scientists that females and beta males feel "safe" when they see signs of an alpha male around nearby toilets.

"What are you doing?"
"I'm marking my territory!"

"Cleaning up the spatter?"
That's why God invented women

"Cleaning up the spatter?
That's why God invented mens' socks.
One quick wipe of the foot and it's as clean as a whistle."
Huh...my boys don't wear socks :(

I kinda like the new laws...I'd rather not have those weirdos in my bathrooms! The thought of standing next to "Shirley" at the urinal is rather disturbing.

Freud was dead wrong about penis envy. When I was little, we girls used to think weewees were stupid and uncomfortable looking and generally unnessesary BUT we all envied the boys' ability to pee standing up, particularly when it came to boating. One of the few advantages to being male, I'd say - I mean in this day and age, what with the patriarchy going belly up and all.
Just sayin'.

""""There seems to be consensus amongst scientists that females and beta males feel "safe" when they see signs of an alpha male around nearby toilets."""

now why would an alpha male use a lady's washroom?????

Old sign in military latrine:

"Exercise marksmanship - the next guy may be barefoot."

And the old stand-by for businesses

We aim to please
You aim too, please

Restrooms should be designated by ideology. There should be a Leftroom and a Rightroom.

Just to make things interesting put the Leftroom to the right and the Rightroom to the left. That way a trans-ideolgy would evolve and SDA would no longer be necessary!

Basically I see nothing here that couldn't be solved by a gigantic tax cut. Defund the sonsab1tches right out of existence.

Except in Europe. They should definitely do this. The lot of them can go to hell in a handbasket for all I care. They asked for it, they're getting it. Toyota.

"now why would an alpha male use a lady's washroom?????"

To perform a community service.

not stirred enough 2:54 - Gah?
Which one would have the huge queue?

Black Mamba, the Leftroom would always be lined up, because they spent all the money on decor and fancy toilet paper instead of putting in enough stalls.

This stuff writes itself, doesn't it? :)

It's been years since I was in night clubs, however women used to come into the mens room and use one of the stalls to pee. There was almost always a line up to get into the womens. Of course, if a man walked into the ladies washroom he would probably get arrested.

The Phantom: "Basically I see nothing here that couldn't be solved by a gigantic tax cut."

Geez, that's your answer to damn near everything. And you're right. :)

How long before the rest of the EUnuchs follow Spain's lead and remove "father" and "mother" from birth certificates?

I'm the only one doing the cleaning hereabouts, so I sit just to make the job easier for myself. I do like urinals though - if I had the space, I'd install one.

I guess I cant call them Euroweenies anymore.

i thought the article was about gender. if it's europe then the women won't have to worry about public toilets because when islam takes over they will only use the toilet at home. as far as canada is concerned if you put the lid down and i have to put it up then you get to put it down.

They are called "rest" rooms so why not kill two birds with one whiz? Pee sitting down, get relief and a rest as well as being more sanitary.

Been squatting to pee for years now, ever since my Orthopedic told me to stop lifting heavy objects.

You know, when Christianity was in the ascendancy in Europe, these issues weren't even THOUGHT OF. Christians are very comfortable with two sexes: you know? Male and female He (G*d) created them?

It's not a stretch to suggest that as Christianity has been trashed in Europe (and we're doing a pretty good job right here in Canada), anything goes -- and I mean anything. Five sexes? GIVE. ME. A. BREAK.

There have been, are, and ever will be only two sexes: male and female. Anything else is an aberration -- very often of an individual's choosing. 'Looks like the UN is UNsexing human beings. If we're not having to pay for the whims of two-passport Canadians, we're having to pay for five porta-potties for each of the new "five sexes."

Can things get any more bizarre?

"Cleaning up the spatter?"
That's why God invented women

That's why even after I installed indoors plumbing, I kept my outhouse.

AMEN, batb!

When all of this craziness completely takes over=anarchy and totalitarianism, there will more than a few who will wish that the Judeo-Christian dispensation were still in effect:

"Dont it always seem to go,
That you dont know what you've got
Till it's gone.
They paved paradise
And put up a . . ." *

MESS!

* Hat tip to Joni Mitchell of Saskatchewan

batb: "Five sexes? GIVE. ME. A. BREAK."

Well, yeah. Off the top of my head, what about heterosexual cross-dressers? What about eunuchs (actual eunuchs, not just Swedes who want to pee sitting down)? Hemaphrodites? Fish-fetishists? People who are still finding themselves, TYVM?

Where would you go hang out if you were just looking to snap a picture of some poorly scrawled nazi insignia?

Mentally-disordered governments in the Free World trying to transform the way everyone goes to the bathroom... men and women casually whizzing standing up together, looking at the ceiling so as to politely not get any glimpse of the other person's wee-wee or woo-woo? Men and women going into stalls, demurely lowering their panties and pantyhose and sitting down to go tinkly winkle whilst gossiping with one another?

But... how will the Muslims feel?

Of course... The Muslims'll have their own bathrooms, and guess what? They sure as hell won't be unisex! After all, the dummies who imposed the unisex crap on non-Muslims don't want the Muslims to cut off their heads, so, of course, gotta have the Mandatory Muslim Exception.

Hmm... ya know, then again, if they're gonna force unisex bathrooms on us, then they'll have to follow through with unisex locker rooms and showers... hey, cool! I'm sick and tired of having to change in a room with just other men, sometimes maybe getting rudely leered at by the ones who wear an earring on their left ear, y'know the types... Unisex locker rooms/showers... great place for me to check out naked women in person and maybe ask one out... I'd be taking hot showers a lot, then, to make a really, really great first impression!

Seriously, however, it's insane. But then again, we're dealing with Far-Left governments hellbent on doing insane stuff all the time...

If you take your dog for a walk and pee on the same tree----you just might be a redneck.
Mature gents do prefer to sit----if arthritis allows---because maturing frequently makes the ritual take awhile...........
such is life......

The World is a mans urinal.

First pee of the day is always done sitting down. That way, if I fall back asleep, I won't bang my head on the tub or sprain the sausage.

Feminists hate science.

As a plumber, I fully support the idea of 5 separate washroom facilities in each and every domestic, commercial and government building application, and that'll be on each floor I might add... I'd like you to know that my friends the electricians likely agree with me on this, as well as our support staff, the framers, the drywallers, the flooring people and or course, tile setters everywhere...
Thank you very much euroweinnies....

After hitting the sack and having a few beers earlier, someone woke me up as I was standing pissing in a box in the hall closet.

Whichever has been around along time, it was called the Men's room. I often use the mens washroom much cleaner and no lineups.

I was on vacation with my daughter travelling in Montana. Caught short I stopped the car on a lonely highway and peed on the yellow line. She asked why and I asked how many times do you get to pee on the yellow line of a highway? She said I was sick and then decided to try it. Sure enough she starts to pee and a truck comes over the hill. True story.

"Let's All Just Pee Sitting Down"

HEY. Shouldn't that be standing up??? I can't write my name sitting down! Euroarabia and Not-So-Great Britian are truly swirling down the toilet.

Mr Teach, I would be reluctant to have any female of my acquaintance use a Whiz Freedom. It is obviously not approved by NASA. Depends are... better on long trips to Florida.

Being the only male in the house who doesn't use a kitty litter box, I always get blamed for splashing. It's a cross we males have to bare. Typo intended, guy's humour and all.

And the colored girls go
Doo, doo doo, doo doo, doo doo doo...

Real men piss into the bathroom vanity and wash their hands.

great read

well,maybe not for a lefty:-))))

"Dont it always seem to go,
That you dont know what you've got
Till it's gone.
They paved paradise
And put up a . . ." *

MESS!

* Hat tip to Joni Mitchell of Saskatchewan

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Joni_Mitchell

when did ft mcleod get moved to Saskatchewan???

Any guy out there enter a womens washroom by mistake...in a mall...during Christmas shopping season...in a big hurry to go #2 you don't clue in there's no urinials...and it's not long before you hear women talking...and you look through the crack in the door and you see women talking... and you panic...wondering how you're going to escape without being caught...and if you are caught by a gaggle of screaming school girls do you run...and look guilty...or do you just stand there and try to act cool...which you know you'll fail at...
Me neither.

I thought she was from Prince Albert, maz.....

Don't trust Wiki...they're still trying to decide where Obama is from. Not sure their position on Iggy though.

Interesting that we don't install urinals in our Nth American homes. Those little tear drop ones that hang on a tiled wall and don't take up much space. They only need one and a half inch drain and half inch water feed line.Then even the dribblers, the drunks and the inferiorly endowed couldn't miss... and the missus would be so much easier to get along with !
I heartily recommend a little urinal in every bathrmoom in the nation.
Socialist's bathrooms excluded of course.

Valencia -- The Archbishop of Valencia has described as "ridiculous" the civil registry's change of the terms "father" and "mother" to "progenitor A" and "progenitor B."

Spanish law allows for same-sex unions, including the adoption of children by homosexuals. Subsequently, ...

Overheard on the skidoo trail a bit ago:

Lady: You GUYS have it so good. You can drink all of the beer that you want and then in 30 seconds go to the can and be on your way. Us girls take 15 minutes to stop. It's SO inconvenient.

Gentleman: Haven't you ever heard of Shamwow?

Lady: You mean that guy on TV?

Gentleman: Yeah. You shove one of those things in your suit and it's good for a sixpack. Just wring it out into a pieplate and say "Get that camera guy?".

Sign in Shell filling station restroom, circa 1966.

WE AIM TO PLEASE--SO PLEASE AIM TOO