26 Replies to ““I’m Paris Hilton””

  1. Oh man – does this mean I have to grudgingly start revisiting my opinion of Paris Hilton? This is pretty brilliant! And very, very funny.

  3. Good for her. Having a self-depricating sense of humour is one of the most endearing traits a celebrity (or anyone, for that matter) can have.

  4. I am actually impressed. I think Rick Mercer should watch out! Yeah, she didn’t write it but she did expose herself to the debate! (Pun so attended) For the first time in her shallow life Paris Hilton can hold her head up high.

  7. Born into wealth, all the advantages educational and otherwise available to her … and the most she has contributed to society is making porn and DUI arrests???
    Really now! Who cares what that vacuous, born-with-a-silver-spoon-in-her-mouth porn star pathetic wastrel thinks about politics?! She’s a walking, talking blonde joke.

  8. She’s never been one to pass up some free publicity.
    And despite what the ‘other’ video of her circulating the internet suggests, she is first and foremost a MEDIA whore.

  9. And here I thought she was just a gorgeous sex symbol waiting to be “ex” ploited!! You can just feel the heat coming off of her!!!

  11. Yeah right! Listen to yourselves! You all would hit that if you could, I don’t care how vacuous you claim to think she is!
    I’m not saying those are the qualities to look for in a leader but she’s no worse then the two dummies in contention in this round or any of the candidates from the last few rounds…

  12. Paris Hilton ‘s fault is her mom’s fault let her daugher used money with no border and her famiiy
    spoil her she has brain damge and abuse girl
    when her mom allow all adultry to daugher and not have anyclas ofrich class peopel then what do you expcet of her Every body see her likejoke
    If you watch some film when the acter get older
    he come back with partner of younger looking man
    to cover les attractive face to people look at young partner instead
    Mr. Macain who is old and bald and not attractive has taste to bring blondy girl in
    to saY i am old but still young girl are
    support me
    if you even look at MCacain wife despite his face even when he was young not nice he choose nice looking woman
    this is American culture that sex always win
    regard to this dummy girl Paris she must go and married and settle like her sister and come out of public she has nogithing excpet one rich faher
    made him tothe public
    she treid every thing in world song, motercycle,
    movie, evne wrie the book who can reallyread the book from this dummy girl
    she only need to settle marry good man richone and stick to that young man and do notkeep changing she is getting too old now if she not findone her freindare gone
    she is not good in anyting because shehad nottalent and not brain and she was in drug as you can see woman with too many boysaround MUST be in druges their brain isgone
    this kids need to read more before she talks or write any more book for even children
    I heard from friend of freind of mine there
    is city in Tabatt near china that woamn can marry
    more htan oneman in real marriage
    I recommanded if Parisnot findany ONE man she can trable and live in Tabet then
    if you look her brain you can not find won
    when you look at her talent not have one
    she is lazy and like party then drug andsex
    while she is only symbole of all rich men’s chidlrend and
    bring her in POLITIC
    NO WAY
    plus this is dange to enter in politic ths is not dance party dear Paris go home and wear
    your pant and do not talk please
    she must drop druge befoe able to stay with one man though
    —
    tell this McCain he is too old for old game of
    sex win please zip up please
    Finally for Paris go and made some fashion show and made clothing for girl teenger and stay among the girls and marry please and disappaer of
    from public to say any opion just behind the scine made some clothing or restauant or
    paintingclor businss forget politic
    that isno for you we do not want anoher bill Kilngon Mr. MaCain is too old to paly with Paris
    how about
    Paris Marry Phantom only Paris can reduce his anger this dods Phantom do not have money ahd has small house and he lovw big buts all the time he is talking about this area or tommyphoni
    even with teenegers
    If I was really a teenger while I am not, I realy scared of all phonytomy slander he chewed then bomberd with hate look like a cow to any innocent teenger with that nasty lanugage
    Future job for paris Hilton: Weel of fortuane
    the lady got old now and fashion show marrying rich man very older than her stop partying too and stop drugand bad driving record too.
    people who are realy poor or people who are realy rich are not normal from my view tehy arenot relistic to facts
    but poor can find good frind butrich never can foudn good freind
    I just know so many people are sick of this Paris of seeing her any where as guest doing nothing
    Paris in polic NO WAY Mr. McCain we prefer his wife or Elizabeth Taylor or paris Hilton’s mom is talking about him at least inage like McCain

  13. This is brilliant! Who cares if she did not think it up, her delivery is what matters. This ‘poor little rich girl’ delivers in spades. If McCaine is smart he’ll espouse what she’s talking about and leave Obama tilting at windmills.

  14. Wow…this was actually…pretty funny? I may have to rethink my opinion of Hilton and her handlers. sure, she definitely didn’t write the spot, but as a previous commenter stated, she has very good delivery and the editing job is nicely done. She even sounded somewhat intelligent….
    Spooky! I was actually laughing!

  17. It’s not that funny, but it’s better than most of the stuff that Will Farrell (who is behind Funny or Die) has come up with in a while.
    But if you were Paris wouldn’t you have to wonder about yourself when your name can be inserted as a punchline to any number of jokes.

  18. “She’s a walking, talking blonde joke” may be true but you have to give her full marks for that comeback ad. My opinion of her just went up a notch and lets be candidly honest here, did her energy policy sound a lot more substantive than either Obama, Gore, or Kowasaki?
    ps, I’d still let her wash my car.

  19. Is Paris an airhead blonde?
    I rather think not. We should never assume that simply because her projected image is entirely trite and of no serious consequence.
    She actually seems to be a very canny expert at “product placement”.
    The “product” being herself, of course.
    In this respect, she is the equal of – Senator Obama!

  21. “See you at the debates, b1tches.” BWAHAHAHAAAAA!!!
    And the really funny part is she has exactly the same credentials to be Prez as Obama. She’s pretty, she’s got media buzz, and she gives good face on TV.
    In fact, she’s actually better than Obama because she can read the teleprompter without saying “aaah”, and “uhhhm” and she knows enough to stick to the script.
    Hey, wasn’t that McCain’s point? Why, I believe it was!

  22. R.Dream
    Way to go with the S.Park reference, it’s my favorite satire. That last scene with Paris and Lemiwink is the funniest ever. I’m reminded of the Oprah S.Park episode WRT the open thread from yesterday. ROFL
    Screw you guys, I’m going home!

  23. Is there a transcript of this available? I’ve never heard her or seen video of her (just still pix) and I don’t want to start now!

  24. “And the really funny part is she has exactly the same credentials to be Prez as Obama.”
    Yeah right Phantom “exactly” the same credentials.
    Are you not the same guy who jumps all over other people’s stupid comments?

  25. To Mrs. Hitlon, mother of Paris Hitlon: Please no more Paris in media and please keep your daughter in home or party only
    for some years until every body forget this young woman name and she may be back to normal life of rich people and get court order to take all septape of your duaghter from media using thier money to do so, before hand and teach her stick with one man and leave poltic man out of her hot tel list that is only think she can help her daughter to act normal by cut the drugs and party from Paris by her momy
    BUZZ media:
    buzz media can be tricky and get mismanaged
    and get go to pay attention to less important person or thing more than to important issue
    priority in buzz media is important
    those milionar pay to made nobody to become somebody some times moneycan not buy the talent at all
    If anybody who is rich need to get filmed and pay attention then main stream media go to otehr indirect way of Hilton septape no real buines and real poltic of serious we are talking
    http://buzzmarketing.com/media/pdf/chapter_13_3_30_03.pdf
    http://www.socialtimes.com/2008/04/track-your-brands-social-media-buzz/
    Paris Hilton:
    she said ” I am hout” and she tried to trade mark
    this word
    Mr. Hilton tried to find one of his generaion to at least look smart to continue his legend so far no luck none of new born babys are smart
    but they only are hut
    she may need to take a tynol tablet to reduce her heat body temperature or mental tablet
    take more cloth off more naked may help her naked dress and schoolnever finis make her hut
    wash her body with cold water and ice like pouring at the end of footbale game to winner to cool her off her talking has not sense of any brilent person but she do try anything to be some body but nothing work but for all failier trial so far looking dumms make her hot
    she did finish treid being with men girls and now she is trying politician old men in her list
    yes she is hot for them she was seen by girl and boys and old and young then she is hot
    she has hot momy and dady with hot money to give her to spend to use all naked dress party make her hot but no more hot top for her
    she has take the market more to funny sick no sense of humour change boy freind weekly, drugs , jail for driving and include her recent brohter arrest, beating with her boyfreinds and
    taping and jail make her saying I am hut
    if she care about those adulty septapes her rich father could sue the guy who filmed her daugher and with court order take all film from media andmovie stores taht nobody able to stay her taht filim any where but he does not care if some one see her daugher naked or saptap since her father trained her this way probably
    as she siad she is hot by septape
    YOu can see rich people dispertly tried all way take off their duahghter to keep them rich still
    but MEDIA BUZZ so far make her more ridiculs
    and Joke to real good person
    the best job for her clothing line , advertising Hilton hotel hot tops , Joker movie funny movies
    with Italian and black or English from England acter may wokr with her
    but all tried no luck so far for her
    if put Khadr’s mom and Paris Hilton’s mom
    in the same movie in one scene when both their chlldren are in jail or were try to help their children it works may all people laugh
    opposition of these two in similarity of these two for spoinling their children probably
    both are so opposite and Mr. Khader and
    Paris Hitlton together Khader would say ” death to america” and Paris saying ” I am hot” defintly it become the most best selling film anybody see it We need Mad tv need to made one
    soon or look like them
    the similarity fo Khadr’s mom and Paris Hilton ‘s mom was both were or are wives of rich men or used to be rich man and both gave tehir children too much freedom to do or go any place and become today media watching for politic today
    I feel really sorry for Paris Hilton and her family doing anything to made their daugher look so stupid up to now
    ‘wheels of fortune” may be or ‘what the price is right” may better for her daughter
    why people pay take her cloth wearng half nafed
    to represnet how proud politican are to use her
    as US buzz media
    What I am trying to explain is buzz media must or should directed to the most important issue and not to pay attention to not brain people instead direction of today media let some peopel get pay attention is wrong while in politic is serious matter joke is allowed but not joker are allowed like paris Hilton to even get filmed
    instead media should put right person to go to right direction ornot come up to politc if sound bad for politic of USA we had enough from
    Mr. Clinton we donot want any more from Obama or McCain septape please… at least for 8 years they better zip it up andnot embrased the US politic any more for doing wrong
    we saw enough shame and embrasment from American politican we hope futue president do not repeat the same mistake.

  26. To: Mr. Hitlton I bleive this is more
    Defame Hilton Hotel name I think using this girl any more. is more race or group
    who love party bikini and love walk in beached
    naked why should white American love
    to walk or go before camera proudly
    show their youn daughter body half naked for sale
    change yor daughter cloth before change the politic if your daughter enter in polict means
    we have to see too many Mr. Klinton girl freind around story to hear real politic campgin
    Since I saw Paris Hilton in media I never go to any Hilton hotel again
    what the bad culture North white American has
    this bad culture need to chang
    Mr. Hitlon dress up your daughter you can borrow
    soem your flag outside of your hotel may it work
    he is bad Man this Mr. Hilton not shame of let
    her daughter go with 10000 man per week
    go man find a good husband for your daughter
    nobody interested to see your daughter body
    There is not sense to shwo body to sell politic
    you dummy politican in USA
    these people who love war with Muslim really!!
    what the waste over this young lady media buzz
    spend
    if she advertise Hitlton hotel ads more people
    visit Hilton Hotel to give her dad more name
    to loose repetiton of Hilton name soon
    http://www.philly.com/philly/hp/news_update/20080803_ap_parishiltonsmomtakesoffenseatmccainshumor.html
    Paris Hilton’s mom takes offense at McCain’s humor
    The Associated Press
    WASHINGTON – Paris Hilton’s mother doesn’t share John McCain’s sense of humor.
    McCain, the Republican presidential candidate, said last week that his campaign ad mocking Democrat Barack Obama with images of Hilton and singer Britney Spears was part of an attempt to inject humor into the presidential race.
    On Sunday, Hilton’s mother, Kathy Hilton, a McCain donor, registered her disapproval.
    “It is a complete waste of the country’s time and attention at the very moment when millions of people are losing their homes and their jobs,” Kathy Hilton said in a short article posted on the liberal Huffington Post Web site. “And it is a completely frivolous way to choose the next president of the United States.”
    plus service of Hilton hotel is not good
    fix your hotel outside design with new fashion
    your hotel is too old by help from your daughter
    cover up body and story and stop legaly your
    daughter movies we are sick of seeing her every where even in politic
    check name of Paris Hilton in google you know what I mean what is wrong with her and her ideas

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